Gambling Addictions

Tag: gambling problem

  • Gambling Recovery: The Illusion of Fraudulent Redemption

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    In the depths of despair, many seek solace in the promise of gambling recovery programs, hoping to escape the clutches of addiction. These programs offer supposed redemption, nurturing a glimmer of hope in the hearts of the desperate. However, beneath their façade of salvation, a sinister truth hides. The gambling recovery industry exudes an aura of fraudulence, manipulating vulnerable individuals and perpetuating a cycle of dependency.

    This blog post aims to shed light on the deceptive nature of this industry, delving into different aspects and presenting a conservative perspective on its manipulative tactics.

    Illusionary Rehabilitation:

    Gambling recovery establishments often present themselves as beacons of hope, promising a way out of addiction. However, their underlying motive is the generation of revenue rather than the holistic healing of individuals. These programs employ a mix of misleading marketing strategies, capitalizing on the desperation of those seeking help, while providing inadequate treatment. They create an illusion of a thorough recovery process but rarely deliver substantial results, leading to a cycle of repeated relapses.

    Manipulation and Exploitation: Behind the façade of a compassionate approach to healing, the gambling recovery industry preys on vulnerable individuals, making empty promises while exploiting their trust. Rehab centers offer exorbitantly priced packages that often leave individuals financially crippled, exacerbating their vulnerability. These centers capitalize on the desperation of gamblers and their families, pushing them to invest their life savings in the hopes of a miraculous recovery. In reality, the focus primarily lies in enriching the recovery center rather than providing effective solutions.

    Lack of Regulation and Accountability:

    One of the significant issues surrounding gambling recovery programs is the absence of stringent regulations. This lack of oversight allows unethical practices to thrive while simultaneously inhibiting the identification and elimination of fraudulent institutions. Without proper regulation, the industry becomes a fertile ground for exploitation, with no repercussions for those who take advantage of the vulnerable. Consequently, individuals seeking genuine assistance are left at the mercy of unscrupulous operators, exacerbating their struggles.

    Inadequate Counseling and Therapeutic Approaches:

    While the gambling recovery industry may claim to offer comprehensive counseling and therapeutic approaches, in reality, the quality of such services remains subpart. Many centers employ under qualified staff members with minimal expertise in gambling addiction treatment. The absence of professionally trained therapists compromises the recovery process, hindering individuals from attaining true rehabilitation. Counseling sessions lack depth, often failing to address the underlying psychological issues that contribute to addiction.

    Eternal Dependence on Gambling Recovery Programs:

    By fostering a culture of dependency, gambling recovery institutions ensure a never-ending clientele, perpetuating the need for their services. They discourage self-recovery, advocating for long-term commitments to their programs as the only path to redemption. Consequently, individuals find themselves trapped within a system wherein their addiction is perpetuated rather than truly resolved. These institutions profit from the continued financial support of their clients, extending the duration of recovery programs unnecessarily.

    Despite the enticing promises of gambling recovery programs, they often serve as mere smoke screens for fraudulent intentions. Preying on the vulnerable and desperate, these establishments exploit the desperation of their clients and exhibit a severe lack of ethical accountability. By exposing the truth behind the illusory redemption offered by gambling recovery programs, society can make an informed choice, advocating for stricter regulations and pushing towards genuine solutions to combat this compelling issue. Only by shedding light on the manipulative tactics and fostering a conservative creative approach can we pave the way for true recovery, free from the clutches of deceitful practices.

    To help me on my journey, I sought support from my family and friends. They had seen me at my lowest point and were desperate to see me break free from the clutches of this addiction. With their encouragement, I enrolled in therapy sessions specifically tailored to help individuals overcome gambling addiction. In therapy, I discovered the root causes behind my addiction. It wasn’t just about the adrenaline rush or the allure of quick money; it was also about the escape it provided from the stresses of everyday life. Gambling became my coping mechanism, my way of numbing the pain and avoiding reality. But now, armed with this understanding, I was determined to find healthier ways to deal with my emotions.I started to fill my free time with new hobbies and activities that brought joy and fulfillment into my life. I took up painting, allowing my creative side to flourish. I joined a local theater group, giving me an outlet to express myself and connect with others. These newfound passions provided a sense of purpose and a healthy distraction from the allure of the casino.As the days turned into weeks and the weeks turned into months, I started to notice a profound change within myself. I was no longer consumed by the urge to gamble. Instead, I found solace in the simple pleasures of life — a walk in the park, a good book, quality time spent with loved ones. It was in these moments that I realized all the opportunities I had missed out on while chasing the elusive high of a winning bet.

    Today, I stand strong and resolute in my decision to quit gambling. It has not been an easy journey, but it has been a necessary one. I have learned the importance of self-reflection, self-control, and the power of seeking support from others.

    My past addiction will always be a part of my story, but it will no longer define me. In conclusion, quitting gambling has opened my eyes to a world of possibilities. I am no longer shackled by the burden of my addiction, and instead, I am free to explore all that life has to offer.

    I encourage anyone struggling with gambling addiction to seek help, for it is only through self-awareness and determination that we can break free from its grip. Today marks the day where I take back control of my life, and I am excited for the bright future that lies ahead. Don’t trust everything you read about gambling recovery side’s. Trust your partner and your family. They are there because they love you always.

  • New Dad’s Dilemma: Should I Stop Gambling

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    Being a new father is a joyous and life-changing experience. As I held my newborn in my arms for the first time, I felt an overwhelming sense of responsibility and desire to be the best parent possible. However, lurking in the back of my mind was a lingering question – should I stop gambling?

    This blog post will explore various aspects of the situation, incorporating both conservative creativity and originality, as I delve into the impact of gambling on my new role as a father.

    To begin, it is crucial to grasp the nature of gambling itself. Gambling is a leisure activity that has the potential to become addictive. It offers excitement, the thrill of uncertainty, and the prospect of substantial financial gain. Yet, with that thrill comes a steep cost – monetary losses, strained relationships, and deteriorating mental health. For a new father, these negative consequences can pose serious threats to the well-being of the family.

    Financial Stability:

    One significant aspect to consider is financial stability. As a new father, I must prioritize the financial security of my family. Gambling, by its very nature, is a risky endeavor and can lead to substantial losses. Every dollar spent on gambling represents money taken away from providing for my child’s future, whether it be for education, healthcare, or even just a comfortable home. It is evident that gambling and responsible parenthood are not compatible, emphasizing the need to curb this costly habit.

    Time Management:

    Another aspect that warrants consideration is time management. As a new father, my time and attention are invaluable resources for my child. Gambling can consume hours upon hours, distracting me from my parental responsibilities. Time spent in casinos or online gambling platforms could be better utilized in nurturing my daughter’s development, creating cherished memories, and being present during her crucial early years. To be an effective parent and give my child the love and support she deserves, balancing time commitments is essential.

    Role Modeling:

    Children learn by observing their parents’behaviors and imitate what they see. This brings us to the critical aspect of being a positive role model for my daughter. If I continue gambling, I run the risk of normalizing this potentially destructive habit in her eyes. She may grow up with skewed perspectives on the value of money, prone to financial and emotional turmoil. By abstaining from gambling, I can show her the importance of responsible decision making, self-control, and prudence when it comes to personal finances.

    Emotional Well-being:

    A new father’s emotional well-being directly impacts his child’s upbringing. Gambling can evoke a rollercoaster of emotions, including excitement, disappointment, frustration, and even desperation. These feelings can be difficult to contain, leading to stress and consequently affecting my ability to provide stability and emotional support for my child. Withdrawing from the world of gambling can help me create a healthier emotional environment and strengthen my bond with my daughter.

    Seeking Professional Help:

    Recognizing the addictive potential of gambling, I contemplate seeking professional help to overcome this habit. This displays a proactive approach in addressing any underlying issues while simultaneously aiding in preserving financial security, time management, role modeling, and emotional balance. Seeking therapy can enhance my self-awareness and equip me with the necessary tools to face this challenge head-on.

    Becoming a new father has presented me with the ultimate dilemma – whether to continue gambling. By considering various aspects such as financial stability, time management, role modeling, emotional well-being, and seeking professional help, I have come to the conclusion that stopping gambling is the best course of action for both myself and my daughter. The decision may require sacrifices and significant effort, but the rewards of being a present, responsible, and nurturing father far outweigh any fleeting thrill that gambling may offer. As I embark on this new chapter of fatherhood, I commit myself wholeheartedly to creating a loving and secure environment for my precious child.

  • The Path to Redemption: How I Regained Control of My Gambling Habits

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    Gambling, with all its enticement and thrill, can easily become a slippery slope. In the beginning, it was a harmless pastime—a way to escape the monotony of life and seek a fleeting sense of excitement. However, as the allure of fast money gripped me, I found myself trapped in its clutches, losing not just my hard-earned savings but also my self-control.

    This is the tale of my journey, my struggle, and ultimately, my redemption, as I regained control of my gambling habits.

    Like many others, I succumbed to the dazzling world of gambling through an innocent visit to a local casino. The atmosphere, the twinkling lights, and the sound of slot machines beckoned me to try my luck. In those early days, my bets were modest, serving as mere entertainment. However, the addictive nature of gambling soon gripped me tight, captivating my senses with its promises of untold wealth.

    Soon, gambling went from being a harmless escape to an all-consuming habit. The casinos became my second home, and my life seemed to revolve around the spin of a wheel or the flip of a card. I started gambling recklessly, betting larger sums in a desperate attempt to recoup my losses. And as the hole I found myself in grew deeper, I began to realize that I had lost control of both my finances and my life.

    Rock bottom arrived unceremoniously one bleak morning when I awoke to an empty bank account and a stack of unpaid bills. It was at this moment that I realized the true extent of my gambling problem. The desperation and defeat that engulfed me could no longer be ignored. It was time to take control of my life and face my addiction head-on.

    Recognizing the need for professional help, I sought out support groups and counseling services specialized in addressing gambling addictions. The camaraderie and collective understanding I found within these groups were instrumental in my recovery. Sharing stories, strategies, and personal triumphs with individuals who had faced similar battles, instilled within me a newfound hope and determination.

    Understanding the triggers that led me to gamble was pivotal. I discovered that boredom, stress, and feelings of inadequacy served as catalysts for my addictive behavior. Armed with this knowledge, I began to develop healthier coping mechanisms. Engaging in physical activities, pursuing creative hobbies, and cultivating new friendships became my outlets for release, effectively diverting my attention from the previously all-consuming allure of gambling.

    One of the hardest lessons I had to learn was relinquishing control. I accepted that I couldn’t gamble responsibly, and thus, had to eliminate all opportunities for temptation. This meant avoiding places associated with gambling, cutting ties with acquaintances who shared the addiction, and installing internet-blocking software on all my devices. By making these difficult decisions, I was taking charge of my recovery and reclaiming my life.

    Without the thrill of gambling, I realized I had a void to fill. To redirect my energy, I embarked on a journey of self-discovery, exploring new interests and envisioning a future devoid of the shackles of addiction. Volunteering at local charities, attending self-development workshops, and pursuing educational endeavors not only provided me with purpose but also served as a reminder of how far I had come from the depths of despair.

    The road to regaining control over one’s gambling habits is far from easy, but through perseverance, self-reflection, and seeking supportive networks, I was able to redeem myself. It is a journey that continues every day, reminding me of the importance of maintaining vigilance and nurturing a healthier mindset. My story serves as a testament to the power of self-transformation, emphasizing the ability to regain control and live a fulfilling life, free from the grip of addiction.

    Gambling ruined 4 years of my life.  However my recovery has been slow and I am still learning more about my real true self every day. For this purpose, I have developed a platform, https://gambling-addictions.com/, where you can find sincere advice from ex-addicts and also share your story to reach out for help. 

  • The Path to Redemption: Overcoming the Grip of Gambling

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    Gambling has always been an integral part of my life, providing me with excitement, adrenaline rushes, and the illusion of easy money. However, over time, what started as harmless entertainment gradually morphed into an insidious addiction that began permeating every aspect of my being. Realizing the grip it had on me, I embarked on a journey of self-discovery, a quest to replace my gambling habit with healthier alternatives. With a conservative approach and a dash of creativity, I discovered transformative methods to reclaim my life from the clutches of addiction.

    The first step in any journey is recognizing the problem. I acknowledged the devastation gambling had caused in my financial and personal life. I took time to reflect and understand the underlying causes of my addiction, delving deep into my past experiences, relationships, and emotional stability. With a newfound clarity, I chose to confront my demons head-on.

    To overcome addiction, support is indispensable. I confided in my closest friends and family, humbling myself to ask for their assistance. Their empathy and understanding became my guiding light, providing me with the strength required to face the challenges ahead. Together, we explored various avenues to replace my gambling habit.

    I was determined to fill the void left by gambling with activities that brought me joy, purpose, and fulfillment. Rediscovering old hobbies such as painting, writing, and playing musical instruments adorned my days with newfound creativity and self-expression. Engaging in these activities gave me a sense of accomplishment and allowed me to channel my emotions towards constructive endeavors.

    Nature, in all its grandeur, has a way of restoring peace and tranquility to our restless souls. I found solace in immersing myself in the serene beauty of the great outdoors. Clambering up mountains, breathing in the crisp air, and reconnecting with the Earth’s natural wonders empowered me with a renewed sense of wonder and rejuvenation.

    To break free from my gambling habit, I needed to delve into the depths of my subconscious mind. Through introspection and meditation, I unraveled the concealed motivations and triggers that fueled my addictive behavior. This process, daunting yet liberating, enabled me to release negative patterns and find inner peace.

    Surrounding myself with individuals who encouraged personal growth and wellbeing became a priority. I sought friends who shared my interests in self-improvement, spirituality, and wellness. Establishing meaningful connections with like-minded individuals enriched my life and provided steady support, reinforcing my commitment to move away from gambling.

    Recognizing the complexities of addiction, I sought professional guidance from a therapist specializing in gambling addiction. Together, we unraveled the intricate web of thoughts and emotions that fuelled my addiction. Their expertise and guidance equipped me with coping mechanisms, enabling me to reframe harmful thought patterns and replace them with healthier alternatives.

    Repairing my financial situation became an essential part of recovery. I enlisted the help of a financial advisor who guided me through debt management, budgeting techniques, and investment strategies. Slowly but surely, I untangled myself from the financial wreckage caused by gambling, paving the way for a secure future.

    My journey to replace my gambling habit was paved with adversity, resilience, and innovative approaches. Embracing conservative creativity, I found redemption in embracing hobbies, cherishing nature, self-reflecting, nurturing relationships, seeking professional guidance, and getting my finances back on track. Today, I am a transformed individual – escaping the clutches of gambling addiction, reclaiming control of my life, and embracing a brighter, healthier, and more fulfilling future.

  • Taking a Gamble: A Battle Against Gambling Companies

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    In today’s fast-paced and interconnected world, gambling has become an alluring pastime for millions of individuals seeking excitement, entertainment, and even fortunes.

    However, it is essential to acknowledge the darker side of this industry, which has left many individuals and families entangled in financial ruin and emotional distress. As a strong believer in personal responsibility, I find it troubling to witness how gambling companies exploit vulnerable individuals.

    I have made the decision to sue these companies to shed light on their unethical practices and hold them accountable.

    Growing up in a conservative household, I was taught to value hard work and prudence when it came to financial matters. However, like many others, the allure of easy money at my fingertips caught my attention. Intrigued by the promises of high stakes, I made my first foray into online gambling, hoping to strike it rich. Little did I know that this first step would catapult me into a world of addiction and despair.

    As I delved deeper into online gambling, the euphoria of winning fueled my desire for more, lulling me into a false sense of control. However, the elusive nature of success soon revealed itself. Every financial gain was swiftly overshadowed by even greater losses. The initial thrill soon morphed into an uncontrollable urge to recoup my losses, and I found myself trapped in a cycle of despair, unable to break free.

    Discovering Disturbing Tactics:

    As I navigated the treacherous waters of online gambling, I began noticing the subtle tactics employed by these companies to keep participants hooked. The use of state-of-the-art algorithms and game design aimed to manipulate psychological vulnerabilities, ensuring that players would keep coming back for more. These companies preyed on individuals’weaknesses and financial hardships, amplifying their profits while leaving countless lives shattered.

    The Breaking Point:

    It was on a cold winter evening when reality finally came crashing down. I found myself drowning in a sea of debt, not only risking my own future but also jeopardizing the well-being of my loved ones. The sleepless nights and the look of despair on their faces pushed me to the edge and gave me a newfound determination to fight back.

    Seeking Justice:

    With a renewed sense of purpose, I embarked on the challenging journey of suing gambling companies. Armed with resilience and a conservative approach to creativity, I gathered a team of like-minded individuals, connecting with lawyers who shared my belief in this cause. The goal of our lawsuit was not merely to seek personal retribution but to shed light on the unethical practices employed by the gambling industry.

    Legal Battle:

    The legal battle against gambling companies proved to be no small task. We navigated through intricate legal procedures, ensuring that our case was grounded in concrete evidence of their manipulation and exploitation. Expert testimony from psychologists and professionals delving into the darker side of gambling provided us with a solid foundation on which to build our claims.

    Public Awareness:

    As our case gained traction, media outlets began covering our story, giving voice to the countless individuals who had fallen victim to the gambling industry’s deceptive tactics. Public sentiment shifted, and calls for stricter regulations and greater accountability grew louder. Conservative communities across the nation rallied behind our cause, recognizing the urgent need for change.

    The Verdict:

    After months of arduous legal battles, the day of the verdict finally arrived. With bated breath, we awaited the judge’s ruling. To our delight, justice prevailed. The gambling companies were found guilty of exploiting vulnerable individuals, and a substantial settlement was awarded to those affected. Our victory not only provided financial compensation but also marked a significant turning point in the fight against the gambling industry.

    Conclusion:

    Suing gambling companies was a journey marked by personal growth, determination, and a steadfast commitment to justice. We were able to challenge the status quo and expose the exploitative nature of this industry, which thrives on the misfortune of others. While this fight may have ended, the battle to protect individuals from the clutches of gambling companies continues. By raising awareness, fostering dialogue, and pushing for stricter regulations, we can create a society that values responsible gambling practices and safeguards the well-being of its citizens.

  • WHY I CAN’T STOP LYING

    WHY I CAN’T STOP LYING

    “I am not upset that you lied to me; I am upset that from now on I can never believe you”-

    Friedrich Nietzsche

    After being more than 2 years free from gambling activities, I noticed that I still have a huge problem with lying to my partner. It became a habit and somehow I can’t stop lying to my partner. Someone once said to me that for as long as you lied to your partner, expect them not to believe you for the same time after you stop lying. It will hurt when they question you when you are telling the truth, you will be surprised because you never even thought to lie.

    This advice helped me to think that did I achieve anything worthwhile by lying or cheating. I started thinking that what I am hiding from her? Why I am so insecure? Why my self-respect is at rock bottom? Why I am addicted to lying? Sooner I realized that lying is like a slippery dangerous slope with nothing good at the bottom but misery and empty life.

    We all lie in different situations in our lives. We all have our reasons for lying, it may be to escape punishment in our childhood. When we grow up, we lie to get attention or sympathies and some even create stories to set friends against each other or get others in trouble. It is an expression of being afraid, what others will think, afraid of facing the reality. We want to show people that we are better than others and reflect the weakness of our character. This could be the result of low self-esteem, fear of rejection, desire to please, or any other nuanced reasons. A liar justifies or makes stories to cover up something he has done wrong. To cover the first lie, another lie is required and this leads to an endless chain of lies. I had no idea about my case, why I was manipulating different situations to lie with my partner. Sooner I realized that I am a habitual liar, I tried to discover the root of my behavior, why I am doing and what I am avoiding. I thought that if I want to spend the rest of my life with my partner, I must avoid this habit of lying to restore the level of trust in our relationship. 

    If you are constantly lying to your dear ones and you are not able to do anything about it, then you don’t want to change. You cannot change what has developed in you for years. If someone matters to you in your life then you have to be truthful or else you will end up losing not only that person but your importance, your respect and the likeness you were trying to create will go away in a moment and will never come back. All the lies which are still covered can come crashing down on your head at any time. You will live in constant fear of the truth being discovered and expose you which creates a bad effect on your nerves. Stop living in dream world with a fake identity. Get out of your unreal world and start living in present rather than the past or future.

    A person who often tells fibs will never have trustworthy friends and will not be loved by anyone. Life is not only judged by a rich lifestyle, fluent language ability, or branded clothes. It is measured by the number of faces who simile when they hear your name. Analyze your life and try to find how it has impacted your life and others around you. Somewhere or somehow it has broken a lot of innocent hearts or brought tears to the eyes of your loved ones. Do you think you feel happy about it?

    How To Stop Lying?

    Start thinking, why you want to quit lying, think about the bad things associated with being a liar. I am not an expert by any means but you must ask yourself why you are lying? Why are you not comfortable with the truth? Learn to appreciate things you have in life and be satisfied with your family, friends, and your surroundings. But what makes sense to me is that instead of trying “not to lie anymore” which is difficult to achieve in one day, try to focus on making little but sturdy progress. Think to yourself why you’re lying? Why are you not comfortable with the truth? Is it because you are not confident? Or on the other hand you fear reality?

    You can’t change the past, the past is immutable. But as long as you understand that the time of yore was something that you’ve learned, and then it won’t haunt you as much.

    Few imperative things to consider while struggling to come out of this habit:

    • Never give up! People have thrived in breaking the nastiest & most addictive habits, you can do the same!
    • Change is going on in little- often not noticeable steps. Don’t be disheartened if you don’t observe changes immediately, YOU ARE CHANGING!
    • There will be setbacks. There is no way to accomplish a goal without failing on the way. Remember: failing doesn’t mean to stop struggling and starting all over again; you rewired your brain by fighting your habit & it will become easier & easier until it will go away!

    Like other habits, you don’t want to fix the awful habit, you want to reinstate with a good habit. That good habit is the truth. Truth is freedom, truth is real, not fake. Don’t let the old practice of lies keep telling you the big lie – that lying is OK and won’t harm you. Every lie is like a bullet hit in the heart of your honor. It’s one more rope around your neck that can choke you and pull you down a road of despair. Embrace truth with all its consequences, and never look back.

    People are faulty, people misspeak, and people need to correct themselves all the time. There is a higher probability that your family and friends will much more easily forgive and forget a lie that is corrected seconds after it’s spoken than one that is left to stand. 

     If someone asks you a question and you don’t want to tell them the truth, just refuse to answer. This may not be the best solution in all situations, especially if the person who is asking the question is depending on the answer, but it works for many. If someone asks about something personal or just needs a detailed answer it’s fine to say, “I’d rather not talk about that,” or, “I’d prefer not to say anything about it,” More often, if you explain that it is something personal, people who know you better will not force you to explain. If they insist and push the issue you can use the same answers as one of the above, “I don’t want to talk about it right now.”

    Sometimes you’ll mess up, someone will mention a lie you told a while ago. The best thing in such a situation is to admit the truth, apologize for what you’ve said, and tell them you’re working towards becoming a more honest person.

    Let yourself become someone new. In your life, you’ve lied a lot, and if someone called you a liar, they wouldn’t be wrong, but actually, it hurts. Always accentuate to be the person you want to be, emphasize truthfulness. Every time you lie by reflex and have to correct yourself, don’t feel ashamed, only focus on the correction and not the lie. The correction is a sign of improvement that shows that you are getting better. As time goes on you’ll find you’re correcting yourself less and one day you’ll realize, you haven’t lied in over a week. Eventually, you’ll hardly ever feel the urge to lie, and when you do have that urge you’ll have the emotional tools to deal with it.

      Truth does set us free because with truth there’s nothing left to conceal, no more wild stories to keep track of. Truth facilitates us to pursue real dreams, gain success in our lives, and accomplish things that will make us feel unbelievably good and happy about ourselves, instead of empty and disgraced.

     In my opinion, stop lying to your loved one is the greatest and most significant decision you will make in your life. It’s seriously important stuff and will redirect your life like nothing else. 

    The past is always there in the background, you can’t change any part from that period, just learn to ignore it. It won’t bother you if you keep yourself focused on the present and the upcoming future. As you know that the past was something that you’ve learned and will never repeat such mistakes then it won’t haunt you as much.

    Telling people the truth is one of the best things you can do. They might be despondent, yet they will see the value in the way that you conceded your bad behaviors and told them the truth. People you love may leave you and never trust you, it’s never too late, realize it that is how humans are programmed to be.

  • Gambling’s impact on families 

    Gambling’s impact on families 

    Statistics say that 80% of Americans have tried gambling and 5% of those players will end up with a gambling addiction. The problem with statistics is you don’t know what it’s telling you. For me its’ just a number. It’s always only a partial representation of the thing you are trying to understand. I do not want to bore you with statistics, but I would like to inform you that those numbers are way higher. All those families are affected by problem gambling. 

    We still know very little regarding the coping strategies that family members employ in order to mitigate the harms caused by a loved one’s gambling.Family members also experienced psychological barriers to help seeking, often feeling too overwhelmed by other things to seek support and help.Family members of loved ones who gamble have valuable and insightful things to say yet their voices are rarely heard. Family members must also be encouraged to attend support groups, financial counseling.

    Compulsive gambling is a major public health problem.Those with an addiction to gambling will not always have financial problems. While gambling can cause a player to lose their money, it’s not the gambling addiction definition.Gamblers aren’t even playing for the money. They play because it boosts endorphins in the brain which alleviates stress. Gambling is an obsession and the anticipation is as important to the compulsive gambler as the win is.

    Gamblers are masters at blaming external circumstances and other people for their troubles. I still do that often.Blaming others is one way to avoid taking responsibilities for my actions. 

    If you’re living with a compulsive gambler, you’re already familiar with the never-ending cycle of lies.You should never take the blame for their troubles. However, you can encourage them to seek help, support them in their efforts, protect yourself. Remember that you are victim of gambling addiction as well. Feeling like a victim is a natural result.

     I heard that people are saying that “He is not in a relationship with you, he is in a relationship with gambling”.  I wouldn’t quite put it that way myself. I agree there is very little being given to you by gambling addict at this point, and relationships are as much about giving as about taking.   The ultimate question is … do you really love him and does being with him make you happy.

    The road back to recovery isn’t easy, but staying isn’t easy either. It will take time for the wounds created and compounded by compulsive gambling to heal.

    Gambling ruined my life, and I was not the only one to suffer. There are hundreds of such people out there who have gone through the same trouble. My mission is to help them share their story so that they may get help in time.

    Visit my website, https://gambling-addictions.com/ and share your story of recovery and be the motivation for thousands who fell prey to this addiction.

  • Part Two: My Partner is a Gambler

    Part Two: My Partner is a Gambler

    Written by my fiancé

    My fiancé agreed to write about how finding out about my addiction was for her. I think this is the only proper and honest way my readers can have the full picture on how a life of a family gets ruined by a gambling addiction. This is her side of our story, the second part:

    Part Two:

    I have two Master Degrees in design and up until now I have considered myself well educated. Yet I knew nothing about addictions and gambling. No one from my family had that problem. I felt so angry that all the schools that I finished didn’t teach me anything about dealing with mental illnesses and “earthquakes” in life that shake and ruin all we thought we knew so well.

    Giving Uri two weeks to move out put additional pressure on me. I had no idea how to deal with problems I was facing. The love of my life, my fiancé, the future dad of my kids, was so terribly ill and I was kicking him out, cause I didn’t know what to do. I was absolutely sure he didn’t love me and that I failed as a partner, cause he chose to hide his problems from me.

    Is gambling really an illness or just a sign of weak character? If he broke the leg, would I cancel the IVF and tell him to move out? What is compulsive gambling? Is it curable? Why was the doctor from IVF clinic telling me that gambling is not a big deal? Why was she telling me that I should support him in his recovery? Why didn’t she see his illness as a big deal? I was so confused.

    I told my sister about Uri’s secret. She got so mad and upset, saying he should be happy we didn’t live in the same city. She hated him from the bottom of her heart.

    I felt so ashamed. All my life I was living respecting everyone and everything, following all the rules. Getting drunk was still something I have never experienced, because I just never liked the taste of alcohol and dizziness I would feel. I have never broken any rule and have never taken any risky move, especially not financially. Now being with Uri felt as if he is doing all I never wanted to experience.

    The first week, after I found out, was extremely hard for me. I felt unbearable anxiety because I told him to move out, yet I didn’t know a thing about a gambling addiction. I decided to contact 3 psychologists an hear what they have to say. The first one screamed, saying that I should leave him immediately and consider getting back in touch after a year, when he potentially solved his issues. She said that the gambling addiction is one of the hardest, cause addicts don’t feel any consequences on their body, as they would with alcohol or narcotics, so that their bodies cannot benefit from getting rid of toxins. The doctor said it will be extremely hard for me to live with him because of all the mood changes and that I don’t need that in my life. I am young and can find someone who will be better for me. I cried so much after meeting that doctor and have decided I will never contact her again, cause her approach was too radical and not something I wanted to hear.

    The second and third psychologists had the same view on the matter. They said it’s a disease and should be treated as such. It’s not something you can see, feel or touch, but is something that can be worked on with proper therapy. They said no one knows if it will be cured and to what extend, but everything is possible. They have also said that it is amazing he admitted it and is willing to go to therapies, cause that’s a huge step that many gamblers don’t take. They told me to take one step at a time and that he doesn’t need to move out until I make up my mind and make decisions about how I want to proceed.

    I told Uri I don’t want him to move out yet and that I need more time to think. That immediately lowered my anxiety and gave me piece. Now I “just” needed to figure out how I wanted to proceed which became one of the hardest tasks in my life..

    Unfortunately, right after that shocking event, COVID 19 pandemic started, over which Uri lost his job, since the restaurants closed down. Even if I decided I didn’t want to continue the relationship with him (which I didn’t), we couldn’t separate, cause our families lived in other countries, borders were closed and people stopped seeing each other because of the lockdowns. We decided to keep on living together until we feel more stable and back to some kind of normal.

    Fast forward to 6 months from when I found out about his illness… I learned so much about the addictions, because that was the only way I could help both me and him. To this day it’s not clear for me if we will have future together and if we are good for each other. I still didn’t make decision if I wanted a relationship with him. It seems impossible because of all the fears and questions I have, but that I don’t have an answer to. We are still living together, but as roommates. For some reason, he is so angry at me, because he thinks I didn’t support him enough. I gave my best, but all the expectations I had regarding his recovery both mental and financial made it so hard for both of us. He constantly felt as if he is not good enough for me and I felt completely neglected and alone. I couldn’t understand why he stopped kissing and hugging me. Psychologist, that I kept on seeing all these moths told me that I have to initiate close contact, because he must feel as if he completely lost his identity by revealing his secrets and that he is absolutely insecure. However, I thought that our relationship became one sided as he didn’t put any effort and didn’t care about my feelings at all. He didn’t make any financial recovery plan that would give me some understanding on how our future might look like and how much he would be able to provide monthly. E.g. what if we decided to proceed with IVF treatment, who would be paying for it, how would he be able to support our potential baby? To this day all those questions remained unanswered and are making me feel very uncertain about his abilities to take care of me, his family and of his love for me. If he loved me and if he cared for me, wouldn’t he first make sure I am feeling safe and not this much in dark about his plans and future?

    I am trying to understand him, to help and support him as much as I can, but at the same time I shifted my focus from him to me. All that I tried to do, all the numbers I called, all the information I gathered feels to me was waisted. I am sure he will do all that is necessary, but in his own pace, not mine. We are not the same and it was wrong from me to expect he will fix his problem as I would.

    All I can do now is to hope and pray he will manage to fight his demons and will come out of it stronger than he ever was. In the meantime I will focus on myself and take necessary steps that will improve my life.

    Advice for gamblers:
    I know you are going through so much, I really do. There are so many new things that you have to do, like group therapies, talking to psychologists, dealing with all new emotions that come with facing with addiction… However, try to make some room for your loved ones. They are going through equally hard times. Their lives have changed dramatically too. Maybe you’re not good conversationist, but that shouldn’t stop you trying to talk to your family. Tell them how you feel every day, so that they would be able to understand you better. Don’t let them make assumptions about anything, but talk, talk, talk and I promise you, the more you try the better you will become. It’s not about the perfection, it’s about the progress. Your loved ones deserve to know everything, because they too have just one life that they are trying to live as best as they can. We all should respect time we are all spending together and dreams the others are having. Be open and honest, so that your family can fight this together with you, with the right information. You’re in this together!

    I wish you all the strength to fight this disease. Never doubt your worth or intelligence! You are amazing and can do this for sure!

    Advice for affected family:
    Two most important things I learned:

    1. Gambling addiction is not your fault!
    2. You need to focus on yourself!
    3. Fins a good therapist that will help you go though rough times

    All you can really do for your partner/loved one is to help him/her find the therapy s/he deserves to have, give advices what you think should be done and try to understand that addiction is a disease. Unfortunately, all the hard work addicts need to do, not you. Maybe it will be so clear from the beginning that you won’t leave your partner no matter what and that is great. I wish it was clear for me from the beginning, but it really wasn’t. If you feel similar to how I felt – absoluthy lost and not sure how to continue living with the addict, here is what I have to say:

    You will probably feel ashamed for what is happening to you, you will probably loose some friends because they won’t meet your expectations, or they won’t know how to approach you, as it always happens when we need fiends the most. You will also learn who your true friends are (many friendships will become stronger) and all of this is ok. This experience will teach you so much about life. You will realize what really matters, what your priorities are and how you want to live your life. You will probably spend a lot of time crying, thinking, wondering why it had to happened to you, maybe you will start taking things personally and as if Universe has something against you, but that phase won’t last too long. You just need to give yourself time to heal and to really listen to your hart and what it wants. Only when you follow what you really feel and desire, only then you’ll be able to find piece within yourself. You’re not obligated to stay with the addict and you should never fell like you abandoned her/him if you decide to leave. You have just one life that you need to live to the fullest. You should never think of things that don’t go according to your plans as mistakes, but as valuable lessons. Take time to make decisions as I am doing right now. I will still wait until I know exactly what I want to do.

    I wish you all the best!

  • I Lost My Partner Because Of Gambling

    I Lost My Partner Because Of Gambling

    True luck consists not in holding the best of the cards at the table; luckiest is he who knows when to rise and go home.

    Reference: John Milton Hay

    Indeed, a wise man always knows when to quit. Gambling addiction is well known as The Silent Killer; it pushes you towards the edge and then sits aside to watch you die as life slips away from your finger. Saying this from my personal experience that gambling leaves a mark on your life. Sometimes, it’s in the shape of a never-ending series of debts, and sometimes, it costs you the ones you loved the most.

    It’s not like gamblers are unaware of the problems; they are very much aware of the impacts- debts, loos of control, daily quarrels, and helplessness. But the thing is the craving will not let you rest until you’re not up for another round at poker table. Gambling feeds on your wealth, family, emotions, relations, last but not least, your health. 

    It goes both ways; gambling affects your relationship, and sometimes, peoples who are fed up with the relations seek refuge in gambling. This habit isolates him further, and each time he looks around, the herd becomes thinner. It provokes a gambler to find an escape from this disastrous life through gambling, while, in reality, it destroys his very essence piece by piece. 

    I lost someone too! And sharing this here will not heal my wounds, but it will mend my grief. Gambling addiction does affect your relationship and can have devastating effects. First, it rakes the trust between relations, and then never-ending lies choke it away completely. The lies, secrets, and gambling itself are the factors that ruin families.

    Hi! Myself Uri and I am an ex-gambler. Losing someone can be harsh, and if this someone is the love of your life, the pain is devastating. Today, I will share with you how your partner will react when he/she finds out about your addiction.

    1. Your Relationship Will Change

    Embrace yourself because this is reality. Once your partner finds out about your gambling addiction, his/her impression of you will change. It may be positive or negative. In most cases, as soon as the partner knows this fact, he/she will decide to leave to whether immediately or in one’s own good time. 

    Gambling is a curse; it drives a wedge in your bonding and then turns it into bits. These bits block the view of your love for your partner. He/she feel like you’re ruining their lives by being unfaithful. It takes huge courage and honesty to drive a relationship. But the broken promises and lies made your partner lose faith in you.

    So, it’s true when I say; the truth will change your relationship with your partner for good.

    2. Feel The Change In Behaviour

    An addict behaves out of order, and in most cases, this is the only reason they get caught. When your partner knows this fact, they feel betrayed. This is where all the hard-earned money was going! Their minds suddenly filled with negative thoughts. They lost complete trust in you, and then comes the change in behaviour. Your partner starts hiding things from you.

    The loving thought of shared dreams, love, mutual respect, and promises that define the very deep emotions of your partner’s commitments were perceived to be betrayed. Your gambling behaviour fades all the good that you have done, and only the stamp of gambler remains by which you’re judged. Once your partner finds put about gambling addiction, you will see that:

    • Your partner starts ignoring you
    • He/she will not share the bed with you anymore
    • Your partner will not tell you his personal affairs anymore
    • Suddenly starts cutting you out from his/her life
    • The love in your partner’s eyes will fade away
    • You will lose respect and faith

    In gambling, you will win big, but the thing you will lose is not just money. It will always be more than you can ever imagine.

    3. Things Will Go Sideways

    Yes! Things will definitely go sideways. Your world will fall apart slowly as sand grains slip from hand. You will feel like fish trapped in a jar. Speaking from personal experience- You can’t run from it, you can hide from the consequences, and certainly, you can’t beat the odds. Not until you make a mind and do something about it. But what happens when things go sideways? At first, you will observe the behavioural changes of your partner, and the never-ending fights will begin. You and your partner will fight and argue over trivial things.

    Your partner will hate your presence, and even after things settle down, they will always remain vigilant about your daily routine. Your partner will meddle into your affairs, and this will start irritating you. But we can’t blame them for this, can we?

    If I talk about myself, it took me years to understand that it was never about winning or losing. It’s the blow we like. We just love to blow away every cent, and with it every relationship we hold dear. In the end, what remains is a long list of loans to prolong the guilt, shame, and anger.

    “As long as the gambling continues, your mind will always stray in darkness, and you will keep chasing your lost memories in the dark mist of the past. The money and relations you have lost are gone forever” 

    How does It end?

    It’s the most painful part. It is also very hard for your partner to leave you. When your partner finds out about your gambling addiction, it comes as a surprise. At first, they take their time to digest the shock and understand the situations. In most of the cases, they feel pity and sticks with you until they can. I have seen many couples struggling over this issue.

    The bad days- days you don’t want to talk about will come, days that will make you lose sleep in the night will follow you. With all this burning inside, your partner will slowly make his/her way out of your life.

    They don’t want to lose their love for gambling, so; they struggle to maintain their relationship. But in very few cases, they dare to make it to the end. Feeling nauseous, confused, and disoriented, their only option will be to let you deal with it and run away. 

    Trust me! They will run away as there is only much one can bear. 

    I read somewhere- The scariest thing in the world is to be left alone. When one loses all the hope, faith, money, and even feel the end is near, the support and love of others kept him going. But when you lose respect, support, and relations, this destroys you, and an addict does that to himself. It takes a lot of soul searching and time to make relations and memories, but all it takes one wrong decision to fade it all.

    How I Lost My Partner To Gambling?

    Let me share with you guys- The Story Of My Life! HOW I LOST MY LOVE, and my partner to this addiction. She was everything to me, the most important person of my life. Our life was perfect, we had moved in together about 3 years ago and enjoying life to it’s full. We were the perfect fit for each other, like the missing pieces of a puzzle. I knew her mood swings, habits, likes, and dislikes and was always there for her.

    We got engaged, and everything was going as we had planned. We were saving money for our better future and were looking to have a dream life together full of joys and love. Last year, we travelled in the summer and decided to have a baby to complete our family. We booked for an IVF (In Vitro Fertilization) treatment and started choosing cute names for our future family members.

    In between these pleasant times, we had brought a dog in our new apartment that we had rented about nine months ago. In the evening, when I come home from a tiresome work routine, I used to play with our dog, and then we spend the night discussing our day. But I don’t know she got the air of my gambling habit that changed everything. At first, she became angry for not telling her, and afterward, the arguments and long fights become a permanent thing.

    She supported me initially, but as time passed, she didn’t want to stay with me anymore. Just like that- My life was torn apart, I promised to quit, but she didn’t believe me. Trust was gone and she didn’t believe me anymore. After serious fights and never-ending arguments, she asked me to move out of the apartment.

    I don’t blame her for that, as it was me who was to blame. I did that to myself. I lost her because of my foolishness. After that day, I promised myself that I would quit gambling, start working hard to have a new life, and never make that mistake again that cost me everything. At my blog gambling-addictions.com, I share my experience as a gambling addict and want the people to know that if they won’t quit this habit in time, they will lose their partner as I did.

  • Will I Ever Be Able to Watch Sport Again?

    Will I Ever Be Able to Watch Sport Again?

    If you are a compulsive gambler, then you most likely “borrowed” from credit cards, family, friends – anywhere where money was available, hoping to fund one more bet that gets you back on track. I know, because that is exactly my story. I didn’t get the big win to get my money back, but instead a huge debt. 

    Even after admitting I am a compulsive gambler, unexpected problem occurred: complacency and listening to ‘the voice’ (‘I have things under control so it will be fine to have one bet’). Fighting with my addiction also left me wander if I will ever be able watch sport again, without having an urge to gamble.

    For many years, I used to watch football, especially big tournaments like World Cup. Watching with my friends on the weekend somewhere in the pub and having few pints was special for me. I still remember times when “real” Ronaldo was playing. For me he was the best player in the world.

    For many of us, a sporting event is an opportunity to take some time out and indulge in something entertaining on an otherwise boring weekend. Even if we don’t make it to the stadium, we make sure to watch the live broadcast of the event when our favorite team is playing. Be it soccer or horse racing, we love watching them for the sheer fun and entertainment they provide.

    But there are many others who take the fun to an addictive level—something that costs them their valuable monetary earnings and savings. That’s the horror of sports betting and gambling addiction that’s engulfing millions of people in countries like the US and the UK. Major sports leagues, such as MLB, the NHL, the NBA and the likes have become avenues where sports bettors place bets (huge ones) and seek to multiply what they put in. 

    However, the results aren’t favorable always. Since it’s a game of chance, nothing’s guaranteed and people land up losing even their fortune to the urge to gamble more till they get something out of it. Rising debts and remortgages cause them immense mental and financial distress, and take a heavy toll on their overall wellbeing. 

    The good news is there is help. People who have become aware of this destructive pattern approach professionals to break it. Some of them even land up in a rehab center where they are kept away from any opportunity to watch sport lest they feel the urge to gamble again. Most of the awakened gamblers prefer not to watch live sport again because they find the ads and content triggering enough to fall off the bandwagon. In fact, they wish betting on sport was outlawed because many people fall in the addiction trap again.

    Nonetheless, if you are a recovering gambling addict, a lot depends on your willpower. If you choose to improve and stay on track, you will soon be able to watch sports without the urge of gambling away your hard-earned money. 

    If a bar with the football on TV, or a club with your favorite  slot machine is the beginning of the gambling trigger for you, then you should avoid going there for a while. I don’t trust myself and that is why I stopped checking the sports results for a while. My biggest worry is that I will be exposed to gambling promotions during sports broadcasts and I won’t be able to resist them.

    One day I hope I will be able to watch my favorite team playing, without having an urge to gamble. I cannot wait those times when I will be able to rediscover the joy of watching football again, without being sucked to the betting nightmare again.