Gambling Addictions

Tag: Gambling Debt

  • The Cautionary Tale: Gambling’s Grip on the Human Psyche

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    In a world where high-stake casinos and online gambling platforms beckon individuals with promises of instant wealth, it is no surprise that the allure of gambling has captivated the hearts and minds of many. However, beneath the flashing lights and whimsical charm lies a dark underbelly that reveals the true nature of this activity.

    Recent studies suggest that as many as 1 in 4 people believe they know someone who has experienced problems with gambling. This alarming statistic serves as a stark reminder of the dangers that can accompany the thrill of gambling. Through a conservative lens, we delve into the various aspects surrounding this issue, exploring the potential consequences of allowing gambling to consume one’s life.

    Gambling holds a unique sway over the human psyche. It tantalizes with the illusion of winning big and experiencing a life of luxury, captivating all who dare to partake. The proliferation of online gambling platforms and easily accessible casinos only exacerbates this temptation. Individuals find themselves drawn into the bright lights, infectious sounds of slot machines, and the sweet whispers of chance. The initial excitement turns into obsession as the desire for quick fortunes consumes their thoughts, leading to devastating consequences.

    Behind the glamour of high-stake winnings lies a much darker reality, as one in four individuals bear witness to the havoc wreaked by gambling addiction. Families torn apart, financial ruin, and psychological turmoil are just a few of the demons that haunt those who succumb to the allure. Partners are betrayed, children suffer the consequences, and once-strong relationships crumble under the weight of lies and deceit. The untold stories go beyond the mere statistic, silently replaying the horrors of an addiction that holds individuals firmly in its grip.

    Gambling often serves as an escape from the harsh realities of life. Within the casino walls, problems seem to evaporate, replaced by the momentary thrill of winning or the adrenaline rush of near misses. It provides individuals with an illusion of control, a fleeting sense of power over their own destiny. This form of escapism becomes addictive, gradually stripping away one’s ability to confront and solve life’s challenges. Solitude and introspection give way to a perpetual cycle of reckless gambling.

    What begins as a pleasurable pastime can rapidly spiral into desperation. As financial resources deplete, gambling addicts are forced to employ drastic measures to fuel their habit. Credit cards are maxed out, loans are taken, and even criminal activities may be pursued to satisfy the insatiable thirst for more. Once they enter this downward spiral, getting out becomes increasingly difficult. The very act of chasing losses perpetuates the cycle, leaving individuals trapped in a living nightmare.

    Though the tendrils of gambling addiction run deep, there is hope for those caught within its grasp. Support networks, counseling, and treatment centers offer a lifeline, providing a platform for individuals to rebuild their lives. Stepping away from the enigmatic allure of gambling requires strength, perseverance, and a commitment to self-improvement. Only by acknowledging the problem and seeking help can individuals hope to regain control over their lives and free themselves from the clutches of addiction.

    The statistic revealing that 1 in 4 people believe they know someone who has experienced issues with gambling paints a harrowing picture of the pervasive grasp this activity has on society. Despite the conservative approach, it is crucial to acknowledge the creativity and resilience individuals can employ to rise above the dangers of gambling addiction. By shedding light on the various aspects of this issue, we can generate awareness and propel dialogue, fostering a society that values the well-being of individuals over the allure of instant wealth.

    It is now time for you to step out into who God wants you to be and I am on this journey to guide you on your road to recovery. God has a great purpose for your life and now is the time to discover those buried talents that He has blessed you with.  

    Win or lose in gambling but a life anchored in Christ is a definite win.

    Gambling ruined 4 years of my life.  However my recovery has been slow and I am still learning more about my real true self every day. For this purpose, I have developed a platform, https://gambling-addictions.com/, where you can find sincere advice from ex-addicts and also share your story to reach out for help. 

  • New Dad’s Dilemma: Should I Stop Gambling

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    Being a new father is a joyous and life-changing experience. As I held my newborn in my arms for the first time, I felt an overwhelming sense of responsibility and desire to be the best parent possible. However, lurking in the back of my mind was a lingering question – should I stop gambling?

    This blog post will explore various aspects of the situation, incorporating both conservative creativity and originality, as I delve into the impact of gambling on my new role as a father.

    To begin, it is crucial to grasp the nature of gambling itself. Gambling is a leisure activity that has the potential to become addictive. It offers excitement, the thrill of uncertainty, and the prospect of substantial financial gain. Yet, with that thrill comes a steep cost – monetary losses, strained relationships, and deteriorating mental health. For a new father, these negative consequences can pose serious threats to the well-being of the family.

    Financial Stability:

    One significant aspect to consider is financial stability. As a new father, I must prioritize the financial security of my family. Gambling, by its very nature, is a risky endeavor and can lead to substantial losses. Every dollar spent on gambling represents money taken away from providing for my child’s future, whether it be for education, healthcare, or even just a comfortable home. It is evident that gambling and responsible parenthood are not compatible, emphasizing the need to curb this costly habit.

    Time Management:

    Another aspect that warrants consideration is time management. As a new father, my time and attention are invaluable resources for my child. Gambling can consume hours upon hours, distracting me from my parental responsibilities. Time spent in casinos or online gambling platforms could be better utilized in nurturing my daughter’s development, creating cherished memories, and being present during her crucial early years. To be an effective parent and give my child the love and support she deserves, balancing time commitments is essential.

    Role Modeling:

    Children learn by observing their parents’behaviors and imitate what they see. This brings us to the critical aspect of being a positive role model for my daughter. If I continue gambling, I run the risk of normalizing this potentially destructive habit in her eyes. She may grow up with skewed perspectives on the value of money, prone to financial and emotional turmoil. By abstaining from gambling, I can show her the importance of responsible decision making, self-control, and prudence when it comes to personal finances.

    Emotional Well-being:

    A new father’s emotional well-being directly impacts his child’s upbringing. Gambling can evoke a rollercoaster of emotions, including excitement, disappointment, frustration, and even desperation. These feelings can be difficult to contain, leading to stress and consequently affecting my ability to provide stability and emotional support for my child. Withdrawing from the world of gambling can help me create a healthier emotional environment and strengthen my bond with my daughter.

    Seeking Professional Help:

    Recognizing the addictive potential of gambling, I contemplate seeking professional help to overcome this habit. This displays a proactive approach in addressing any underlying issues while simultaneously aiding in preserving financial security, time management, role modeling, and emotional balance. Seeking therapy can enhance my self-awareness and equip me with the necessary tools to face this challenge head-on.

    Becoming a new father has presented me with the ultimate dilemma – whether to continue gambling. By considering various aspects such as financial stability, time management, role modeling, emotional well-being, and seeking professional help, I have come to the conclusion that stopping gambling is the best course of action for both myself and my daughter. The decision may require sacrifices and significant effort, but the rewards of being a present, responsible, and nurturing father far outweigh any fleeting thrill that gambling may offer. As I embark on this new chapter of fatherhood, I commit myself wholeheartedly to creating a loving and secure environment for my precious child.

  • A Dance with Lady Luck: My Journey through the World of Gambling

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    Gambling, an intricate and captivating world that has fascinated mankind for centuries. I, myself, am not a specialist on the subject, but my experiences have granted me a unique perspective.

    This blog post will delve into my personal journey into the realm of gambling, exploring its various aspects and the conservative creativity it kindles within us.

    My journey through the world of gambling offered an unexpected glimpse into the human psyche. It allowed me to witness the seductive allure and the devastating consequences that accompany this societal fascination. While I may not be a specialist on the topic, my experiences afforded me a deeper understanding of gambling’s different aspects and the conservative creativity it ignites within us all – a dance with Lady Luck that leaves an indelible mark on our lives.

    My life became a constant cycle of chasing losses and trying to conceal the true extent of my addiction from those around me. I lived in a perpetual state of denial, convincing myself that I still had control over my actions and that everything would eventually fall into place. But the mirage of control that I clung to so desperately was just that – a mirage. The truth was, I was engulfed in the destructive grip of gambling, and it seemed as though there was no way out.But in the darkest of moments, a glimmer of hope emerged. It was through the unwavering support of my wife that I found the strength to confront my addiction head-on. She stood by me, reminding me of the person I once was and believed I could become again. With her guidance, I sought professional help, attending therapy sessions and joining support groups where I connected with others who had experienced the same struggles.

    Recovering from a gambling addiction is not an easy path, but with each passing day, I regain a sense of control over my life. I am slowly rebuilding the ruins of my past mistakes, working hard to repair the relationships that were shattered. I have come to realize that it is through acceptance and taking responsibility for my actions that true healing can occur.

    My life may have been ruined because of gambling, but today, I stand as a testament to the power of resilience and the unwavering support of loved ones. I have learned the importance of self-reflection, of recognizing and addressing the root causes of my addiction. It is through this understanding that I can now embrace a new chapter, one that is free from the clutch.

    Gambling ruined 4 years of my life.  However my recovery has been slow and I am still learning more about my real true self every day. For this purpose, I have developed a platform, https://gambling-addictions.com/, where you can find sincere advice from ex-addicts and also share your story to reach out for help. 

  • BetGuard: A Revolutionary Gambling Blocker App Transforming Lives

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    In a rapidly evolving digital age, where technology has become an integral part of our lives, addictive behaviors such as gambling have found a new platform to thrive. Recognizing the need for a powerful tool to combat problem gambling and provide individuals with much-needed support, a visionary team of software developers and psychologists came together to create BetGuard, the best gambling blocker app available today. This blog post explores BetGuard’s astonishing capabilities and how it has revolutionized the fight against gambling addiction.

    As the curtains were drawn to unveil BetGuard, the audience’s anticipation built up. The app, known for its exceptional user interface and visionary features, was a result of years of meticulous research and development by a team committed to making a tangible difference in society. BetGuard boasted a cutting-edge real-time monitoring system that operated across multiple platforms, blocking access to gambling websites and apps within seconds. This unique approach offered users a powerful deterrent against impulsive gambling tendencies. BetGuard’s most exceptional feature was undoubtedly the artificial intelligence (AI) integration. Through continuous learning and analysis of user patterns and behavior, BetGuard could swiftly identify potential relapse indicators and intervene effectively. The AI-driven algorithms in the app not only blocked problematic content but also alerted designated support networks, such as friends, family, or therapists, assisting in the recovery process. The visionary engineers behind BetGuard aimed to create a holistic solution that prioritized both prevention and support.

    Awareness campaigns played a crucial role in encouraging the use of BetGuard. Using visionary marketing strategies, the team behind the app collaborated with renowned psychologists and addiction experts to emphasize the importance of seeking help and utilizing innovative resources like BetGuard. Webinars, seminars, and a series of TED talks were organized to educate the public about the adverse effects of problem gambling and present BetGuard as a vital ally in combating addiction. The response was overwhelming, with thousands of individuals downloading the app.

    Understanding the importance of making the recovery journey engaging and interactive, BetGuard introduced gamification elements. Users could earn rewards and progress through levels by following a personalized recovery plan, attending therapy sessions, and achieving milestones. These elements fostered a sense of accomplishment and motivation, transforming the path to recovery into an exciting adventure. The visionary thinking behind this approach aimed to shift the perspective on recovery from being a burden to an empowering experience.

    BetGuard’s visionary team recognized the need for collaboration to maximize the app’s impact. They forged partnerships with major gambling operators, ensuring BetGuard’s integration with their platforms. This collaboration not only limited access to gambling sites but also created a seamless user experience when transitioning from high-risk environments to safer digital environments. By uniting professionals from diverse backgrounds, BetGuard had effectively built a comprehensive support system for those seeking recovery.

    As the news of BetGuard spread worldwide, its visionary approach garnered international recognition. Governments, organizations, and institutions began reaching out to secure partnerships and support the adoption of BetGuard as a mandatory tool for gambling operators. This global impact demonstrated a significant shift in societal attitudes towards problem gambling and reinforced the importance of comprehensive addiction prevention measures.

    The real measure of BetGuard’s success lay in the countless lives transformed by the app. Users worldwide praised its visionary features, expressing gratitude for the newfound self-control and regaining of their lives. Stories flooded social media platforms, illustrating the remarkable impact BetGuard had in instilling hope and strength in those burdened by addiction.

    BetGuard, the best gambling blocker app to date, has shattered conventional expectations with its visionary approach and integration of cutting-edge technologies. From its extraordinary real-time monitoring system to the revolutionary AI integration, BetGuard has proven to be a game-changer in combating problem gambling. With its gamification elements, collaborative partnerships, and tremendous global reach, the visionary team behind BetGuard has created a tool that offers new hope to individuals battling addiction, empowering them to regain control of their lives and write a brighter future.

  • Taking Control: Five Strategies to Repay Gambling Debt

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    Gambling, often seen as a form of entertainment, can easily spiral out of control, leaving individuals burdened with mounting debts. As the consequences of unchecked gambling behavior begin to settle in, the need to pay off those debts becomes a pressing concern. This article delves into five effective strategies that can help individuals regain control of their financial situation and repay their gambling debts, while promoting responsible financial habits.

    1. Create a Budget and Stick to It:

    The first step towards paying off gambling debts is to establish a comprehensive budget that includes all necessary expenses. This budget must prioritize debt repayment by allocating a significant portion of income towards this purpose. For instance, one can adopt the popular “50/30/20″budgeting rule, which designates 50% of income for essential expenses, 30% for discretionary expenses, and 20% for repayment of debts, including gambling debts. However, to achieve success, discipline and adherence to the budget are essential. Develop a clear understanding of fixed expenses, adjust discretionary spending to a minimum, and resist the temptation to indulge in impulsive purchases.

    2. Seek Professional Debt Counseling:

    Navigating the complexities of gambling debts may require professional assistance. Engaging the services of a certified debt counselor can provide valuable guidance in formulating a structured debt repayment plan. These experts specialize in assessing personal financial situations, providing customized advice, and negotiating with creditors to reduce interest rates or establish more manageable payment plans. Debt counselors can also help individuals develop healthier financial habits, reinforcing the importance of staying debt-free.

    3. Consider Debt Consolidation:

    Consolidating multiple gambling debts into one single loan can help simplify the repayment process, reduce overall interest rates, and lower monthly payments. Debt consolidation entails securing a loan typically offered by financial institutions, using it to settle existing gambling debts, and then repaying the new consolidated loan over an extended period. This approach allows individuals to primarily focus on repaying one loan, reducing the burden of tracking multiple debtors and varying interest rates. However, it is crucial to conduct thorough research to identify reputable lenders and carefully review the terms and conditions before committing to consolidation.

    4. Increase Income Streams:

    Augmenting existing income sources by exploring additional avenues is an effective method to expedite gambling debt repayment. Individuals burdened by substantial debts can consider taking up a part-time job alongside their full-time employment, engaging in freelance work, or even monetizing certain skills through online platforms. The additional income can be exclusively allotted towards paying off the gambling debts, accelerating the repayment process. Furthermore, this approach not only helps individuals settle their debts faster but also instills valuable work ethic and financial discipline.

    5. Embrace Lifestyle Changes:

    Overcoming gambling debts necessitates adopting lifestyle changes that promote financial stability and responsible behavior. This involves avoiding triggers that may lead to further gambling or excessive spending, such as visiting casinos or high-risk environments. Instead, individuals should engage in alternative activities that fulfill their interests and provide productive outlets for energy. Joining local support groups or seeking therapy can also aid in addressing the underlying issues that contribute to gambling addiction, fostering better mental and emotional well-being. Finally, maintaining open communication with family and loved ones can prove beneficial by fostering a supportive network and garnering their assistance in staying on track with debt repayment goals.

    Conclusion:

    Regaining financial control and repaying gambling debts require discipline, responsibility, and a proactive approach. By creating a budget, seeking professional debt counseling, consolidating debts, increasing income streams, and embracing lifestyle changes, individuals can successfully emerge from the clutches of gambling debts. However, it is essential to remember that these strategies are not a quick fix and require dedication, patience, and the cultivation of healthy financial habits. By implementing these measures, one can not only overcome gambling debts but also pave the way towards a more stable and secure financial future.

  • Taking a Gamble: A Battle Against Gambling Companies

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    In today’s fast-paced and interconnected world, gambling has become an alluring pastime for millions of individuals seeking excitement, entertainment, and even fortunes.

    However, it is essential to acknowledge the darker side of this industry, which has left many individuals and families entangled in financial ruin and emotional distress. As a strong believer in personal responsibility, I find it troubling to witness how gambling companies exploit vulnerable individuals.

    I have made the decision to sue these companies to shed light on their unethical practices and hold them accountable.

    Growing up in a conservative household, I was taught to value hard work and prudence when it came to financial matters. However, like many others, the allure of easy money at my fingertips caught my attention. Intrigued by the promises of high stakes, I made my first foray into online gambling, hoping to strike it rich. Little did I know that this first step would catapult me into a world of addiction and despair.

    As I delved deeper into online gambling, the euphoria of winning fueled my desire for more, lulling me into a false sense of control. However, the elusive nature of success soon revealed itself. Every financial gain was swiftly overshadowed by even greater losses. The initial thrill soon morphed into an uncontrollable urge to recoup my losses, and I found myself trapped in a cycle of despair, unable to break free.

    Discovering Disturbing Tactics:

    As I navigated the treacherous waters of online gambling, I began noticing the subtle tactics employed by these companies to keep participants hooked. The use of state-of-the-art algorithms and game design aimed to manipulate psychological vulnerabilities, ensuring that players would keep coming back for more. These companies preyed on individuals’weaknesses and financial hardships, amplifying their profits while leaving countless lives shattered.

    The Breaking Point:

    It was on a cold winter evening when reality finally came crashing down. I found myself drowning in a sea of debt, not only risking my own future but also jeopardizing the well-being of my loved ones. The sleepless nights and the look of despair on their faces pushed me to the edge and gave me a newfound determination to fight back.

    Seeking Justice:

    With a renewed sense of purpose, I embarked on the challenging journey of suing gambling companies. Armed with resilience and a conservative approach to creativity, I gathered a team of like-minded individuals, connecting with lawyers who shared my belief in this cause. The goal of our lawsuit was not merely to seek personal retribution but to shed light on the unethical practices employed by the gambling industry.

    Legal Battle:

    The legal battle against gambling companies proved to be no small task. We navigated through intricate legal procedures, ensuring that our case was grounded in concrete evidence of their manipulation and exploitation. Expert testimony from psychologists and professionals delving into the darker side of gambling provided us with a solid foundation on which to build our claims.

    Public Awareness:

    As our case gained traction, media outlets began covering our story, giving voice to the countless individuals who had fallen victim to the gambling industry’s deceptive tactics. Public sentiment shifted, and calls for stricter regulations and greater accountability grew louder. Conservative communities across the nation rallied behind our cause, recognizing the urgent need for change.

    The Verdict:

    After months of arduous legal battles, the day of the verdict finally arrived. With bated breath, we awaited the judge’s ruling. To our delight, justice prevailed. The gambling companies were found guilty of exploiting vulnerable individuals, and a substantial settlement was awarded to those affected. Our victory not only provided financial compensation but also marked a significant turning point in the fight against the gambling industry.

    Conclusion:

    Suing gambling companies was a journey marked by personal growth, determination, and a steadfast commitment to justice. We were able to challenge the status quo and expose the exploitative nature of this industry, which thrives on the misfortune of others. While this fight may have ended, the battle to protect individuals from the clutches of gambling companies continues. By raising awareness, fostering dialogue, and pushing for stricter regulations, we can create a society that values responsible gambling practices and safeguards the well-being of its citizens.

  • How to trust the gambler

    How to trust the gambler

    I will be honest with you – it will be very hard for you to trust the gambler again, but it’s not impossible. It takes a lot of time, good communication skills, dedication and effort. 


    One of the things that helped me and my partner were sessions with a therapist. In one of the sessions, we ended up having a fight. (Embarrassing, right?) However, even tho it was so embarrassing for both of us, it helped, because the therapist pointed out that the language we used vas very aggressive. We were verbally attacking each other, almost without hearing what the other had to say. There was no compassion, just judgement. After that session, we started paying attention to the way we speak and slowly (to be more accurate: super slowly) our conversations started to feel less toxic.


    What can also help you is to remind yourself that gambling addiction is a disease and no one chose to have it. I would advise you to try to understand how “naked”, lost and fragile a gambler, who has revealed her/his gambling secrets to you and hopefully is on a journey to recovery, feels. It’s not easy for a gambler either. It was a huge step for them to realize and admit there was a problem. 
    Having said all of that, I would like to point out that you need to listen to yourself and your thoughts all the time. I believe it is important to tell a gambler what your needs are and what would make you trust her/him. Maybe you would like to be informed or get an access to his/her bank account or maybe you would like to know  what recovery plans s/he has.. If you want to get the trust back, you both need to work on it. If you see that some things don’t add up, that s/he is still being dishonest, or is not trying to make things work, well… that’s a great lesson too. You will then know if it’s worth investing yourself in that relationship / friendship.
    I would like to share a memory that might shed some light on how we feel and how we think while and after a gambling session with a hope it will also help you understand us better. At first we feel excited and then so guilty. We know it’s wrong, but we have no power to break our bad habits by ourselves.

     
    As for the memory, I would like to share how I felt when I would go to, be at and leave Casino. There was a particularly stupid feeling in front of the casino – you’re fighting with yourself. You know very well how these things will end, but then you convince yourself it’s the last time “just this time and I’ll never do it again”. 
    Then, since it’s the last time, you go inside, take your cold beers and quietly start “milking” the appliance (I like to name this process milking). But the machine “milked” me instead. As always, there is a little euphoria when the machine “gives”, the cold beer gets sweeter and you loose you morals at the right moment – the moment when you should have left. The fact that credit has been maxed out and the monthly salary is “stuffed” into the machine is especially hard to take. Out of self-pity, you make another desperate try for the last money and it’s all over before you know it.After Casino I was almost always completely mentally broken, drunk and so angry – why am I being slapped like that? I was disappointed by the fact I did this to myself again.  If any gambler is reading this, try not to overdo the drinking. Try to stay clear-headed if you intend to gamble. Take only money that you can afford to loose. 

    Recovering gambling addict is going to have many challenges. One of them will be sharing finances with a family or partner. This is an issue that I’m dealing often in my home. My partner makes the majority of our income, but I try to make some extra money doing side jobs. When it’s time to pay our bills, I often find myself short on money. Especially now with Covid-19, there are not many jobs available. While I’m giving my best to earn as much as I can, I still feel lots of quilt not having enough money. Exactly this guilt is making me feel like I don’t want to disappoint her and so often urge to lie surface.To avoid lies, my partner and I talk about our finances once a week. We take a look at our budget to see how we have been spending our money and identify any areas where we need to cut back. This also gives us an opportunity to discuss any other issues related to our money, including upcoming expenses, possible income opportunities, and problems we have with our current spending.

    I learnt that being very open with my partner, helps both of us. This is the best way to prevent and resolve any finance issues. Have open communication. If you feel guilty for spending money because you make less money than your partner, talk about it. Plan how you are going to deal with the differences in your salaries.I remember when I was hiding purchases from my partner. I felt guilty for buying myself something even tho money was mine, but it was meant for something more meaningful than e.g. clothes. She would always notice new clothes and she would be so hurt and disappointed in me. Even tho there is no one else to blame for my lies, I realized with a help of my therapist, that I need to understand myself better. I need to dig into my past and try to understand what made me lie. Is it only gambling or I was lying before too? If so, why was I lying, what triggered me? 


    What helped me was that my partner encouraged me to talk about all new realizations about myself, so that we both can understand my problems better. Only when we feel like we won’t be judged, put on a wall of shame or laughed at, we can start our recovering process.Gambling ruined 4 years of my life. However my recovery has been slow and I am still learning more about my real true self every day. For this purpose, I have developed a platform, https://gambling-addictions.com/
    where you can find sincere advice from ex-addicts and also share your story or to reach out for help. I would like to recommend you to read an advice from Justyn Larcombe (embed the link to his name) on this subject.–

  • You Can Beat the Odds

    You Can Beat the Odds

    Someone far handier than me with a calculator once worked out that the chances of any of us existing anywhere in the cosmos are one in 400 trillion. That’s the kind of odds that, by comparison, make winning the state lottery seem as easy as buying a ticket. 

    What about the odds of being struck by lightning? Are they any better than springing into existence after 4 billion years? The answer is yes. The chances of you being struck by lightning in the US in any given year are 1 in 500,000.

    Now, what do you think the odds are of becoming addicted to gambling? They are, in fact, much less than you probably think. There are 10 million gambling addicts in the US alone. That’s roughly one in thirty of us.

    The statistics are impressive, but as a confessed gambling addict myself, the only statistic I care about right now, at least, is the odds of recovery. I can’t say what the figure is exactly.  What I know from experience is that the chances of an addict returning to the everyday world they left behind when your condition took hold are far, far better than a doctor having to write ‘lightning bolt’ as the cause-of-death on your death certificate.

    Whatever the chances were in my case, group therapy improved my odds of beating a condition that afflicts so many of us. I was skeptical of group therapy at first. The idea of baring my soul in front of a room full of strangers terrified me. I would take any excuse not to go.  Doing dishes and tidying the house suddenly seemed so much more interesting and appealing. I had zero interest in going to group therapy, but I didn’t want to lose my partner. 

    I am glad I went there. For the first time, I found myself in the company of like-minded people. People with similar lives, similar fears and with the same financial issues as I had. I felt I belonged, after such a long time feeling that I didn’t. And that made all the difference to my recovery. We were from different walks of life, but we all had one thing in common – an addiction.

    It’s been now almost  year  since I  escaped from this hell. As each day goes by, my belief that I can’t  actually never gamble again becomes more and more solid. I feel  I can beat the odds and not to fall back in gambling trap. I know  it’s  too early to say that I won the war, but I can tell for sure that I won the battle. I found myself often doubting, then I look at the progress that I’ve made in these past year and it’s amazing. Okay maybe not amazing, because the huge debt is still there. But I’m slowly whittling that down. 

     I’m learning about the value of money again. I even took  Jen Sincero suggestion to  write a letter to my money. Writing this letter to my money I realized how much I was actually abusing money. Maybe correct  word would be “not respecting” it. Time after time I do feel regret when I think f the money I lost. Most my friends have mortgage to pay and I have my huge debt as my mortgage. They will at least have a property and I have nothing.

     I’ll always feel behind where I should be, but I stopped making things worse. It’s a better life without gambling. I see things more clearly now. There are still long way to go and who knows, I might be debt free one day again. My next coal would be another year without gambling. Hopefully with support of my partner I can achieve it.

    I had support. My partner stood by me. Sure, she insisted I tell her every single thing that was going on in my life. I agreed to show her my bank accounts. I consented to telling her when I had urges to gamble. She hasn’t left—not yet anyway—though I sense her struggle. I don’t know how much longer she will stay, but at least I know I am doing what she needs to build trust back into our relationship slowly.

    If you have a gambling problem, take it from me, you can beat the odds. The first step is to reach out for help. Contact Gamblers Anaonymous today and take the first step to get well again.

    Gambling ruined 4 years of my life.  However my recovery has been slow and I am still learning more about my real true self every day. For this purpose, I have developed a platform, https://gambling-addictions.com/, where you can find sincere advice from ex-addicts and also share your story to reach out for help.

  • Young People, God Loves You – Do Not Gamble with Your Life

    Young People, God Loves You – Do Not Gamble with Your Life

    Three card poker, slot machine games, roulette, blackjack, sports betting, bingo… there are so many games available for persons to participate in, not just for entertainment but many are also involved in gambling.  These games can be accessed not only at casinos but also online.  Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose and the sad reality is this activity can become addictive like a drug and many struggle to break free from this addiction.

    Gambling has the potential to ruin your life. You probably chose to participate in this activity out of curiosity or peer pressure but I can tell you that it has the potential to destroy you emotionally, physically, financially and spiritually.  I have been there and I lost everything that I held dear to me and I thank God that He was able to deliver me and has equipped me with the ability to use my experience to assist other young people.

    Young people, God cares about your well-being, He understands your struggle and He is more than able to heal you from this gambling addiction.  

    God Cares about your Well-Being

    God created you in His image and your welfare is important to Him. A life consumed in gambling can have devastating effect on not just the financial loss experienced by many persons, but it can affect your emotional well-being causing major stress and anxiety. This can result in other life threatening illnesses.   God says in His word that “Beloved, I wish above all things that thou mayest prosper and be in health, even as thy soul prospereth.” 3 John 2:2.  Above all things, God wants you to be in good health so that you can enjoy the abundant life He has prepared for you.

    Sometimes you may feel that God is absent as you experience financial struggles and need a way out but gambling is not the solution. Seek God and trust Him to provide for you as He knows our needs and He’s able to provide. “Wherefore, if God so clothe the grass of the field, which today is, and tomorrow is cast into the oven, shallhe not much more clotheyou, O ye of little faith?” Matthew 6:30. 

    God has a special plan for your life and He wants to fulfill His plan in your life.  He says “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end. Jeremiah 29:11.  Young people you are created for a special purpose and God wants to fulfill His plan in your life. You have been endowed with special gifts and talents and God wants you to use your talents wisely as you seek to give glory to Him.

     God Understands your Struggle

    You may be struggling right now to break free of this addiction and God sees and He understands. He is a God of mercy and compassion and it is not his desire to see any of His children destroy their lives.  “For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of ourinfirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin.” Hebrews 4:15.  God knows our weaknesses and you can always trust Him to free you from this gambling addiction.

    The enemy wants to destroy the lives of young people but “Noweapon that is formed against thee shallprosper; and every tongue that shall rise against thee in judgment thou shalt condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the LORD, and their righteousness is of me, saith the Lord.” Isaiah 54:17. You are not in this fight alone – God is with you and He’s holding your hand. Just trust and believe in Him.

    God understands your situation – he sees the many times you tried to quit and yet you went back to embezzle or use your last savings to return to this activity, He understands the disappointments you face when you have this high adrenaline rush and thought you’re now a millionaire but, you again experience another loss. God’s mercy is still extended to you and He can provide the help you need.

    He is able to Heal and Restore.

    “Is there anything too hard for the Lord?” (see Jeremiah  32:27). Absolutely, nothing is too hard for the Lord to do. To break free from this addiction, you first need to admit that you cannot fight this battle alone and you need God to help you. We serve a mighty God who is bigger than that addiction you are struggling with right now and He will provide the help you need. David says in Psalms 34:4 “.I sought the LORD, and he heard me, and delivered me from all my fears.”

    “Birds of a feather flock together”. You cannot expect to soar like an eagle into the person God wants you to become if you are constantly surrounded by negative influences who continue to lure you to participate in this activity. Seeking support from believers in Christ who will pray and support you is vital for your recovery. James 5:16 says “Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much. “ 

    You can conquer this addiction in your own strength so pray and ask God to give you strength.  God has great plans for your life and you have to pledge within your heart that you will not be controlled by gambling. “Flee also youthful lusts: but follow righteousness, faith, charity, peace, with them that call on the Lord out of a pure heart. “ 2 Timothy 2:22. 

    It is now time for you to step out into who God wants you to be and I am on this journey to guide you on your road to recovery. God has a great purpose for your life and now is the time to discover those buried talents that He has blessed you with.  

    Win or lose in gambling but a life anchored in Christ is a definite win.

    Gambling ruined 4 years of my life.  However my recovery has been slow and I am still learning more about my real true self every day. For this purpose, I have developed a platform, https://gambling-addictions.com/, where you can find sincere advice from ex-addicts and also share your story to reach out for help. 

  • Don’t use Cash while in Gambling Recovery

    Don’t use Cash while in Gambling Recovery

    If you run out of sources to finance your bad habit, you can’t play anymore. Logical!? But what to do? Trust your money to a partner or someone you trust. Cut your credit cards and close the accounts. Under no circumstances should you even try to borrow more money! Let your loved one cover your necessary expenses and help you use your finances wisely.

    My partner was taking care of paying all the bills and she was in complete control over my finances. I think that way was only way I would survive and not having cash at all made me less vulnerable to gambling temptation.Having a money in pockets feels good, but living in country where in shopping malls are filled with slot machines is dangerous.

    In fact, the situation in Finland is bad.

    I visited the city Helsinki with my Friends  and the comment that they made is  they find it strange that there is so many slot machines inside shopping malls. The situation is drastic. Casinos have established themselves in all shopping centers without exception. What’s going on ? Nowhere else in Europe is such a thing noticed.

    It’s as bad as casinos advertising themselves as entertainment establishments. After all, casinos themselves produce addicts and their mission is to make a profit, not to entertain people. Total ********. From another point of view, of course, taxes on casinos are high and make up a significant part of the state budget.

    Slot machines shouldn’t be in shopping malls, This creates fewer addicts and the problems they cause (family, economic, …)

    As you move around the city, look around and you will see what is happening …I know people who have played at least a 60 000 euros in the last 3-4 years. Sadly I’m one of them and  I’m looking at eight to 10 years to pay this off. It’s the overwhelming guilt that hangs over you every single day with that debt upon your head. You’ve just got to try and get through that.

    There have been cases where they went to the casino with 5000 euros and 24 hours later called to me to borrow money for food and this was not the only time.

    I would ask people to share the experience with gambling addiction and for example, how it has gone while playing. Is there a feeling that in reality casinos are cheating and monitoring your behavior, gaming habits. For example, using a loyalty card will practically never win. Or you can see with your own eyes how 1000 euros are placed in slot machine and an hour later it’s all over. It also goes to the next player and puts thousands  and also literally nothing.

  • How To Handle Gambling Stress?

    How To Handle Gambling Stress?

    Victory is a fleeting thing in the gambling business. Today’s winners are tomorrow’s blinking toads, dumb beasts with no hope.  

    Reference:  Hunter S. Thompson

    At first, you will find yourself head over heels deep in gambling habit. It will act as an anchor point to keep you away from difficulties of life. It’s an approach to subdue the stress of daily life, and many find escape in gambling from domestic issues. However, it may seem entertaining at first, but when you realize the aftermath of trouble, you will just want to quit it. It is not that easy if you ask me. Because it will become a habit that will consume your health and wealth at the same time. Then gambling stress will kick in. The never-ending gambling anxiety and stress will start to take a toll on your life.

    Hi! I am Uri, and today I will share with you guys, what may cause gambling stress and how to handle gambling stress?

    Let’s speak about the gambling problem first. It’s an activity that an individual adopts to get away from lively troubles or to dream about getting rich overnight. It’s also a behavioral change that can’t be resisted and lead to severe social and personal issues. 

    Gambling is tough to quit, and as an Ex-gambler, I can assure you it’s challenging to keep the urges at bay. The biggest obstacle is gambling recovery is gambling stress. Feeling of shame, unending dept and ruined social life make it even hard to recover from gambling anxiety.  

    Here, I am listing a few activities which will teach you how to handle gambling stress? Without any further ado, let’s get right to our task.

    1. Relax Yourself 

    Relaxation is a phycological response that arises when your body feels anxiety, pain, or stress. It’s not self-aroused phenomena; instead, it is triggered by some activity that diverts your mind. So, the best way to reduce gambling stress is to learn how to relax your body? Gambling anxiety is not like reasonable stress condition. It’s a high level of stress that makes a person physically and mentally uncomfortable. So, relaxing your body in this condition is very important. Do the following activities to keep calm in such situations.

    • Take Deep Breaths
    • Find Alternative Activities To Distract Yourself
    • Control You Nerves and Be Patient

    Learning how to relax is also a skill, and like other skills, if someone wants to develop, it gets better with time and practice. You can also do Yoga or other physical exercises to relax and get a hold of your gambling stress. 

    2. Try Something Unique

    No, I am not talking about trying some new gambling tricks. Instead, I am talking about setting new goals and tasks for each day. As a gambler, your mind develops a particular pattern or routine and urges you to follow it. But if you want to get rid of your gambling stress, try something that you haven’t done before. When you focus on new things to do, the gambling urges will remain in check, and thus, your gambling anxiety will diminish.

    3. Rejuvenate Old Hobbies

    Before adopting gambling as a full-time habit, you must have some hobbies to keep your stress in check. When you feel helpless facing gambling stress and anxiety, it is imperative to rejuvenate old hobbies. This will boost your confidence in fast recovery and provide you with moral support to strive for a healthy life. Like most of the chronic addictions, it is vitally important to find healthier alternatives to replace negative habits. 

    4. Find More Ways To Cope With Gambling Stress

    Stress is meter or scale on which we measure our emotions. It can affect your way to faster recovery. To keep in check anxiety and stress caused by gambling, it is crucial to find new ways to cope with this stress. It does not matter whether you find physical exercise, meditation, driving, gaming, or talking with friends openly. Just find yourself an anchor point to control the temptation of gambling. 

    5. Remind Yourself Gambling Is The Cause

    It is of vital importance to remind yourself why gambling is evil. It will cost you hard-earned money, family relations, friendship, and even physical & mental health. You need to be aware of your body urges. Remember that this was the root of your gambling anxiety. Try everything in your power to stay away from peoples who encourage you to gamble. If you do so, you will not need strict stress management. It will help you keep your stress in check.

    Gambling pushes you to your limits, whether, these limits are financial or metal it doesn’t matter. The result will always be the same- Your Destruction!

    Gambling ruined my life, and I was not the only one to suffer. There are hundreds of such people out there who have gone through the same trouble. My mission is to help them share their story so that they may get help in time. 

    Visit my website, https://gambling-addictions.com/ and share your story of recovery and be the motivation for thousands who fell prey to this addiction.

  • Will I Ever Be Able to Watch Sport Again?

    Will I Ever Be Able to Watch Sport Again?

    If you are a compulsive gambler, then you most likely “borrowed” from credit cards, family, friends – anywhere where money was available, hoping to fund one more bet that gets you back on track. I know, because that is exactly my story. I didn’t get the big win to get my money back, but instead a huge debt. 

    Even after admitting I am a compulsive gambler, unexpected problem occurred: complacency and listening to ‘the voice’ (‘I have things under control so it will be fine to have one bet’). Fighting with my addiction also left me wander if I will ever be able watch sport again, without having an urge to gamble.

    For many years, I used to watch football, especially big tournaments like World Cup. Watching with my friends on the weekend somewhere in the pub and having few pints was special for me. I still remember times when “real” Ronaldo was playing. For me he was the best player in the world.

    For many of us, a sporting event is an opportunity to take some time out and indulge in something entertaining on an otherwise boring weekend. Even if we don’t make it to the stadium, we make sure to watch the live broadcast of the event when our favorite team is playing. Be it soccer or horse racing, we love watching them for the sheer fun and entertainment they provide.

    But there are many others who take the fun to an addictive level—something that costs them their valuable monetary earnings and savings. That’s the horror of sports betting and gambling addiction that’s engulfing millions of people in countries like the US and the UK. Major sports leagues, such as MLB, the NHL, the NBA and the likes have become avenues where sports bettors place bets (huge ones) and seek to multiply what they put in. 

    However, the results aren’t favorable always. Since it’s a game of chance, nothing’s guaranteed and people land up losing even their fortune to the urge to gamble more till they get something out of it. Rising debts and remortgages cause them immense mental and financial distress, and take a heavy toll on their overall wellbeing. 

    The good news is there is help. People who have become aware of this destructive pattern approach professionals to break it. Some of them even land up in a rehab center where they are kept away from any opportunity to watch sport lest they feel the urge to gamble again. Most of the awakened gamblers prefer not to watch live sport again because they find the ads and content triggering enough to fall off the bandwagon. In fact, they wish betting on sport was outlawed because many people fall in the addiction trap again.

    Nonetheless, if you are a recovering gambling addict, a lot depends on your willpower. If you choose to improve and stay on track, you will soon be able to watch sports without the urge of gambling away your hard-earned money. 

    If a bar with the football on TV, or a club with your favorite  slot machine is the beginning of the gambling trigger for you, then you should avoid going there for a while. I don’t trust myself and that is why I stopped checking the sports results for a while. My biggest worry is that I will be exposed to gambling promotions during sports broadcasts and I won’t be able to resist them.

    One day I hope I will be able to watch my favorite team playing, without having an urge to gamble. I cannot wait those times when I will be able to rediscover the joy of watching football again, without being sucked to the betting nightmare again.

  • Interview with Justyn Larcombe

    Interview with Justyn Larcombe


    Friends and family are often key to encourage loved ones with gambling problems to seek help. I was lucky to have my fiancé, who was pushing me to seek professional help. She didn’t give up on me (yet), and she wanted to know everything about the addiction, that was destroying our relationship.

    After trying to learn all she could about the gambling, she discovered that there is not much support nor articles she could find for addict’s partners and their psychological and emotional health. In this difficult period, she contacted many psychologists, because she didn’t know a thing about problem gambling. She wanted to hear from many doctors what their views on this disease was, so that she could form hers. They all gave her different advices. Some said that she should leave straight away, while others told her that she shouldn’t rush with her decision. Advice she appreciated the most was that it wasn’t her fault, as partners often feel guilty and think that they did something wrong.

    One day, after coming home from work, she told me to check a TED talk she found helpful. It was “The fall and rise of a gambling addict” by Justyn Rees Larcombe. It’s a story about ex-military Major that gambled his money and savings.

     A good TED talk does more than just inspires you – it changes the way you see the world, or challenges you are facing. That was exactly what I experienced. It made a huge impact on me, because for the first time, I felt relieved. I wasn’t the only one with this problem, I’m not alone.

    For my biggest surprise, my fiancé bought me a book Justyn wrote “Tails I Lose”. She knew I couldn’t afford it and how much just a short TED talk meant to me. It was the most precious gift I have ever received, because I realized she gave me the second chance and really wants to see me getting better.

    What an inspiration the book was. I realized there is always a way out, no matter how bad the problems might seem. However, after reading the book, I still had a few questions and decided to reach out to Justyn. To my surprise, he replied straight away with equally inspiring advices:

    How did you manage to win back your partner’s trust? Looking from this perspective, what would you advice compulsive gamblers who are still hiding from their partners their addiction? When and how to face their partners with the truth? 

    Justyn: One thing I always say is that it is so much better to tell your partner than for them to find out, but choose a time when you have taken some steps on the road to recovery so you can talk about the issue with some good news.Even if it’s just to say ‘this is what happened, but now I have self excluded’ or ‘now I have stopped and am going to a meeting’.Trust is so preciousand if you tell them there is a chance to keep it, if they find out, it may never come back. There are no easy solutions to life. Someone once said to me that for as long as you lied to your partner, expect them not to believe you for the same time after you stop lying. It will hurt when they question you when you are telling the truth, you will be surprised because you never even thought to lie. So give them time – even if it takes a few years.

    Winning back trust takes time, be patient, look for opportunities to win it back and if the love is still there, the trust will follow in time. You have to work a bit harder to  make sure you follow through with everything you say, even if its just turning up at the time you said you would and don’t be surprised if they question you more frequently. Maybe share your finances a bit more and don’t have separate accounts or lines of credit.

    Winning back trust takes time, be patient, look for opportunities to win it back and if the love is still there, the trust will follow in time. You have to work a bit harder to make sure you follow through with everything you say, even if it’s just turning up at the time you said you would and don’t be surprised if they question you more frequently. Maybe share your finances a bit more and don’t have separate accounts or lines of credit.

    In the UK, 1 in 10 suicides is related to problem gambling and a problem gambler is 15 times more at risk from suicide than non gamblers. It is the shame that drives this statistic. I think it helped me to be honest and to realize I wasn’t the only one. So meeting and talking to others in a similar position – or connecting via a blog will really help!

    Justyn is the CEO of “Recovery Two” charity that is helping others to cope with gambling addiction.

    Justyn: “Recovery Two” offers recovery courses to all addicts and one of the key things we noted, as you so rightly point out, is the lack of support for those impacted by the addiction of a loved one. The focus always seems to be on the addict, there should be more support for family. Gambling addiction has a particular impact on family members because of the debt it causes. So we run a family support group which has been a great help to many.

    In case you need support or would like to learn more about gambling addiction, here is the link of  Justyn’s “Charity Two” where you can find needed information.

    If you would like to watch a TED talk I mentioned, here is the link:
    “The fall and rise of a gambling addict” by Justyn Rees Larcombe.

    If you would like to read Justyn’s book, you can purchase it here:
    “Tails I Lose”

  • Credit Card Ban Could Be The Solution

    Credit Card Ban Could Be The Solution

    Online payments and loans are such an abstract representation of money. You can’t feel money in your hands, but instead, you just see some numbers that most certainly you cannot understand the value of as good as you would with cash.

    Betting online and paying with loaned money didn’t feel real for me. It felt as if it was just an online game without a life changing consequences. It’s funny how even when I would spend a few thousands on a single bet, I would still make sure I was buying the most reasonable priced products in the grocery stores and I wouldn’t be lazy to go an extra mile because of the discounts. It was because I could see, touch, smell and feel what I was spending money on. All my senses were involved in the “physical” purchase.

    Even though credit cards look like any other plastic card in our wallets, it really can change our lives dramatically. You can fall in its trap so easily and it can become one of the biggest supporters of our addictions.

    I started using a credit card when I misunderstood how one furniture store financing worked. The store offered a loan with a promotional introductory rate of 0% APR for the first 12 months. I understood I will get a bill every month, but instead I received a credit card with minus €800 a few days later. Getting the credit card upset me, because at the time I was cautious with my money and I knew those cards have high interest rates. After I paid off the furniture I bought, I left the credit card on a shelf and forgot about it, cause I knew how dangerous it could be.

    When I started to gamble, I was using a debit card. If I would run out of money, my only option was to wait for my next pay day. However, a few months into the addiction, I started to have intense cravings for gambling. Waiting for my next pay day became unnecessarily long and I just couldn’t wait. That is when I rediscovered my long forgotten Credit Card. It was still sitting on the shelf, waiting for some action…

    Gambling addiction is more rampant problem than you might think. It isn’t extraordinary to see millions of people around the globe to start gambling as a one-time experience but soon fall prey to its never-ending loop of winning and losing by chance. While there are many who seek professional help, there are others who go through financial distress, destructive habits and psychological health issues. 

    Major countries like the United States and United Kingdom are taking measures to curb the problem of gambling addiction. One of them is banning the use of credit cards to gamble. A huge chunk of gamblers use their credit cards to bet. But, in reality, that’s the last thing gamblers should think about doing. It may sound quite a convenient option to place bets, but it doesn’t take long for gamblers to be exposed to financial harm.

    Credit card gambling makes people gamble with money that they don’t have. It goes beyond what their pocket allows. Most of these gamblers have whopping amounts of debt on their head because credit cards were easily available and placing bets through them took very little effort. There are also many payday loan websites that offer cheap loans to gamblers. However, they land up losing money more than gaining anything, thereby just accumulating unpayable debts. 

    As such, the ban on placing bets through credit cards is likely to curb problem gambling and protect people from any sort of harm. All offline and online gambling products, except lottery tickets, will be covered under the new measure. Mortgage lenders are also warned by the Gambling Commission in the UK that problem gamblers could remortgage their homes while hiding their addiction pattern. Many charities, financial services and campaigners seem to welcome the ban because this is a measure that will surely minimize the financial risks associated with problem gambling, but also judiciously maintain the integrity of the industry.

    Speaking of credit cards, credit card companies don’t care about our financial wellbeing, just like casinos. I learned that a hard way. I started taking out little sums for my online gambling, and before I knew my card was maxed out. Looking back, using the credit card for online betting, as well as hiding the addiction from my family, were two biggest mistakes I made. I maxed out my credit cards probably 6 times, which I paid by taking loans. It’s a vicious circle that you can hardly get out of.

    Gaming operators have to act in a socially responsible way. Banning the usage of credit cards IS a solution every gambling operator has to apply and the law every country must adopt.

  • Why Recovering Gambling Addicts Fail

    Why Recovering Gambling Addicts Fail

    You should be proud of yourself! I know that I am, because statistically only roughly 5 percent of people with gambling addiction are seeking treatment. Relapse is going to be a big part of our healing process. 

    I had one relapse, after being “clean” for a few weeks. I received an email from the betting website that offered me €20 bet. Why not, it’s a free money? Next thing I know, I lost €400, just when I was thinking I’m doing a good job with my recovery. It was very hard to accept that relapses are normal and that they don’t mean you are not on a right path of your compulsive gambling recovery.                                     

    Millions of people around the globe struggle with problem gambling. It starts with the one-time desire to try, but it doesn’t take long for a person to fall into its shackles. Once that happens, it starts off a life of destructive habits, financial distress, and mental health issues. Despite knowing the negative effects of gambling, people have an uncontrollable urge to engage in the activity—just like smoking, drinking, or drug addiction.

    Once gambling addiction starts, the person who is unable to resist from betting continues to chase the “high” they get from a big win. That’s despite the string of continuous losses, cheating, lying, or even stealing money to keep gambling. In extreme cases, the addicted person tends to undergo a significant personality shift. While the person may hide his or her gambling addiction and engage in working and leading their everyday life, consequences tend to build up in the background.

    Most recovering gambling addicts tend to fall prey to the lures of gambling companies—be it financial rewards, free bets, football tickets and other perks. These are enough to draw a recovering person back to the addiction, no matter how much that costs them in terms of membership fees and losses. It happened with me to, I was constantly getting free bets from gambling companies.

    A relapse of gambling addiction is not a verdict of failure. One should know that relapses don’t occur because a treatment hasn’t failed, or because the person lacks willpower to quit the habit. Relapse, albeit being unpleasant, is an essential learning point for recovering gambling addicts. If addressed properly, it becomes a powerful experience for the recovery process. 

    Undesirable relapses of gambling addiction are common in the recovery process. Also, they can be overwhelming for both, the recovering addict, as well as their near and dear ones. However, one should not confuse a relapse with a slip. A slip is a single unplanned gambling incident; the person briefly engages in the activity, but instantly regrets the move and stops it immediately. On the other hand, a relapse is a return to gambling after not doing it for a long period. If you slip back into addiction, it’s a sign that it’s time to re-evaluate your goal to stop gambling and change your recovery strategy. 

    Dealing with my addiction and all that I have caused has been hard, especially after seeing how much I hurt my fiancé. I hurt her tremendously. Finding her in tears when she thought no one was watching her, made me feel devastated, suicidal at times. We went through a difficult period when she found out and we’re still struggling. Thoughts about how our life would be if I wasn’t a gambler are hunting me constantly. 

    Gambling addiction is a serious disease that will try to sneak up on us when we least expect. Just because you had a relapse doesn’t mean you have to or will keep on betting. Gambling relapse triggers will never entirely disappear. I’m trying to protect my recovery by recognizing the triggers and not falling for them. I decided to go for a run or a walk whenever I have an urge to bet. So far, I had one relapse and 50 km of running and walking.

    Because of COVID 19, there are no games I could bet on. Casinos are closed, so currently I don’t have an urge to bet, because there is nothing I could bet on. Let’s see if things will change when restrictions get lifted. However, if I do end up having relapses in the future, or if you do, then we will have to change our recovery strategy and talk honestly with our therapists/support group, cause only with the help of professionals we can beat this disease.

    Good luck mate, and let me know if I can help you anyhow!

  • Betting Companies Are Ruining Our Lives

    Betting Companies Are Ruining Our Lives

    Imagine this: you are sitting on the porch of your cottage on the Saturday morning. There is a  morning breeze and you can hear birds singing. Your wife is making pancakes in the kitchen and you can hear kids’ laughter while they are playing with the dog. After the breakfast, you start walking towards your boat, witch you prepared for fishing the previous evening. You know that your friends will come for sauna that evening and you feel so happy and accomplished  after working all week in the restaurant… 

    That was my dream and I was working very hard to make it come true. That dream was shattered after my gambling addiction. All what’s left is broken man, who just lost everything what was dear to him. 

    After getting myself into gambling debt, I started thinking how well the  betting companies are actually doing. I wanted to know everything about the gambling industry. I wanted to know where was my money going.

    The world’s first-ever online casino was launched in 1996. Quite recent, right? Today online gambling is one of the fastest growing sectors. It generates around billions in annual revenues and is growing rapidly. Nowadays we have thousands of online casinos.

    I can assure you that betting sites were loving me. I felt so special when one betting site made me a VIP customer. To reach VIP status, you need to be very active and gamble with large amounts of money on the available games. Because I was spending a lot of money, they give me in return free bets frequently. Getting better odds from them too was just icing on the cake. I even had a dedicated account manager sending me emails, asking if I’m happy with my faster banking and  higher betting limits. 

    Strange to think that before my addiction went out of hands, I was thinking my gym membership was expensive (it was €45). Now I was feeding my VIP membership with €4000 a month. What a change in my thinking. How did this happen? Betting companies must be doing well if they have more costumers like me. I needed to know how well betting companies actually are doing. After countless hours spent on research, I made some discoveries. 

    Just like alcohol, drugs or any other addictive substances people fall prey to. Gambling addiction is a real concern facing countries where all or at least some form of gambling is legalized. The multi-billion-dollar gambling industry provides casino gambling and sports betting formats, either in land-based settings or through mobile devices—something that’s engulfed a huge chunk of the world population in their shackles.

    While it’s quite a lucrative and interesting industry, which puts people’s luck to the test, there are inevitable ills that come with it. The gambling operators rely on hefty membership fees from people—from VIPs to the middle-class stratum of society—who wish to participate in various games of chance. Not to forget, online casinos and bookmakers are increasingly leveraging third-parties to extract people’s data that allows for wider promotions of gambling offers. 

    It’s true that traditional online gambling has become costlier than before, but operators are switching to other alternatives to keep consumers hooked. Data on people’s age, income, credit card information, and insurance are used to tailor advertisements and target people through emails. 

    Gambling companies reward gamblers in different ways. Gamblers are the ones who habitually land up losing whopping sums of money by falling prey to perks such as cash back on losing wagers, free bets, or even football tickets. These companies use “dynamic retargeting,” which allows them to winnow out people who have not gambled for some time and lure them into falling off the bandwagon. I was often receiving emails from betting companies, telling me they haven’t seen me for a few days and that they wanted to give me free bets. I accepted all of them straight away.

    Even if some people have put a self-restriction on gambling, these companies are able to potentially lure them back, thus lessening the power of industry schemes. If one is lucky, they can win a fortune. But if one isn’t, they land up losing all they have. Even when I admitted to myself, family and friends that I have a gambling problem, and that I lost €50 000, I was still convinced that I am a very successful gambler. I was constantly thinking how I won more than half of bets, without understanding that I have actually lost everything, even money that didn’t belong to me.

    The constant urge to try their luck puts people in a vicious loop that enslaves them to gambling companies. Yes, these companies are doing well, but at the cost of people’s hard-earned money, while also taking advantage of their addictive psychological patterns. An increasing trend is online casinos and sport betting games, witch due to lack of advertising restriction do not seem very harmful to young people. In my experience they are very much capable to ruin your life. I know that because it ruined my life. 

  • Part One: My Partner is a Gambler

    Part One: My Partner is a Gambler

    Written by my fiancé

    My fiancé agreed to write about how finding out about my addiction was for her. I think this is the only proper and honest way my readers can have the full picture on how a life of a family gets ruined by a gambling addiction. This is her side of our story, the first part:

    I remember texting my sister on the 17th of December 2019, telling her how happy I am for being with Uri, how life is amazing and how I cannot wait to go home to tell him that (which I did btw). I really enjoyed life we built together, how he made me feel every day and I honestly had no doubts if he is the man I want to spend the rest of my life with.

    He started being broke in November, and I couldn’t understand why. The excuses he gave me were acceptable: unexpected bills for the car and wrongly calculated taxes. I believed him. However, I did find him being broke again in December, the second month in a row, strange and suspicious, but it was the very first time it was happening during these 4 years we’ve been together. Shit happens, I thought, and we’re here for each other “for better for worse, for richer for poorer”. I’ve been telling myself that this is something we need to learn to deal with together, and if I wanted rainbows, I had to put up with the rain, right? 

    We wanted and tried to extend our family for the last three years… unsuccessfully. The diagnosis: unexplained infertility. After trying many other methods, we decided to try to have our baby with a help of IVF. It was scheduled on the 6th of February 2020. We had been on a waiting list for 6 months and I couldn’t wait to start with more promising process. 

    In January, as our IVF treatment was slowly approaching, I started to realize that Uri is so relaxed about not having money. It seemed like it would be the third month he was struggling to pay his share of the rent and I couldn’t understand nor accept it. I became very worried, cause we needed money more than ever for upcoming treatments and preparations for the baby. Uri didn’t seem to care. He started spending time watching Netflix, instead of looking for additional jobs. As an excuse for his behavior, he told me that he already has a full-time job and that he deserves to enjoy life too. 

    But how can he think that he should enjoy, if he is not finding a way to return money he borrowed for the last two rents and won’t be able to pay the next one either? How come he doesn’t have money? Why suddenly his salary is not enough for his expenses? When I would start the conversations about his financial situation and IVF, he would become so defensive and angry. It was impossible to talk to him. From loving, caring and kind man, he turned into someone I couldn’t recognize. For the first time ever, I started doubting if I should go to IVF treatment at all. 

    Finally, on the 3rd of February 2020, three days before I was supposed to start with IVF process, he texted me, while I was working, saying he will be struggling again with the bills. After me pushing and asking so many questions, he said he has a problem with the credit card – it went to minus €3800. I asked him out of the blue if he was betting. I have no idea why I asked him that, when there were no signs of him betting before. He said “sometimes”. I was shocked, my heart started beating so fast and my head started spinning. My fiancé, who I shared a life with for four years, who I had scheduled the IVF treatment with, is hiding something so big from me. What else is he hiding? What else I don’t know about him? Do I know him at all? 

    I barely could work that day. All I wanted was to cry. I remember I started crying the moment I left the office. Uri, I thought I knew, was gone. I am living with a liar and a gambler… Wtf.. How come I didn’t notice anything before? Did I do something wrong? Is this my fault? 

    That evening we spent talking. He explained the details and how his credit card was maxed out. My world collapsed. Nothing I believed in was true. 

    Is anything he is saying true? How serious is the gambling problem he has? It must be that he doesn’t love me. He wouldn’t do this if he loved me. Why is he with me then? Did he use my money for betting? Was he stealing from me? Omg.. what should I do? How can I go to IVF if I can’t trust him? Maybe €3800 he can return in a few months, but how will I trust him…

    At first I was extremely sad and in absolute disbelief. I was so sad that he was going through all of this all alone. How lonely he must have felt all these years. I failed as a partner, cause he didn’t trust me enough to share all sides of him. I didn’t understand why he couldn’t trust me enough to share his problems with me, when I was so supportive ad cared for him the best I could. 

    I remember kissing and hugging him so much that evening, as if I could kiss away all the problems and protect him somehow. He was saying that he was so surprised by my reactions, as so was I. He was expecting yelling and judgement, but to our surprise, that didn’t come at all.

    After he went to sleep I realized that I needed more answers which I couldn’t wait for. I woke him up and after asking more questions, her finally opened up and told me everything. 

    OMG.. he borrowed €40 000… Hearing the truth felt as if you opened up someone and saw a huge malignant cancer that you never thought would be there. It was so clear to me that this has to be the end of our relationship and that IVF has to be cancelled. I was overwhelmed with sadness because he struggled so much last 2 years with his sickness. If I only knew, maybe I would be able to help him. All I could think about were all the moments we won’t have: pregnancy, birth of our kids, playing with our puppy, summer vacations, all the laughter, hugs…I was absolutely sure he didn’t love me.

    I cancelled the IVF treatment and told him he has to move out in two weeks.

  • Becoming a Gambler

    Becoming a Gambler

    Did you know that Tesla and Dostoyevsky were also gambling addicts? Tesla lost his tuition money, had a nervous breakdown and dropped out of school. Dostoyevsky’s “Gambler” is semi-autobiographical.*
    Learning that such great minds had the same problem as me was somewhat comforting, it made me stop questioning my intelligence and made me realize it is a disease that I need to fight.

    Occasional bets on English Premiere league started 2017, when I would visit Casino with my friends. In the beginning, I would never spend more than €20 per month. I didn’t see this as a problem, because it was really just for fun. Everything changed when I discovered online Casinos 2018. 

    As I mentioned in the previous post, I am a huge football fan and I am following results religiously. All the websites, that I visit to check the latest scores, have flashy banners advertising betting with free money that you can use for the first bet. Those websites are flooded with odds for the upcoming matches everywhere. I noticed those banners, but have never really paid attention, nor I considered betting, as I saw them as scams. However, one day at work, I’ve heard a few colleagues talking about online betting and how they won. Knowing that the colleagues I respected are betting online, probably gave me subconsciously a green light to try my luck too. I had nothing to lose, I was thinking, because I started with a free bet from the flashy banner. I don’t even remember if I won. I just remember how convenient it was. I didn’t have to dress up, go to Casino nor talk to others – I could play from my own sofa. 

    Without me noticing, after 3 months, my bets got bigger. I was putting about €200 for a single bet. I started becoming addicted to the adrenalin rush I was having whenever I would place a bet. What I was doing was wrong, I knew, but I couldn’t stop anymore.

    Without the doubt, the worst supporter of the growing addiction was my credit card with a possibility of €4600 overdraft. I often wonder if I would mess up my life this much if I didn’t have a credit card. Would I find another way to become a problem gambler? Did the credit card speed up inevitable or none of this would happen if I didn’t have it?

    Using credit card was too easy. It didn’t feel like it was real money. Before I knew it, my credit card was maxed out. As interest was so big, I thought it’s better to take a loan from another bank, because of the smaller interest. The panic I felt, because of the minus, was gone. I felt great and I decided to quit gambling. However, after a week, I was back to my old habits.

    As my addiction was growing, so did the bets. I remember, once I was in the toilet watching a football match (around six months into online betting). Since I was soo sure about the result, I bet €1300. I lost. The panic started kicking in and I had to get my money back. I made another bet for €1000 euros right away. My heart was pounding and I was sweating like crazy while waiting for the results. I lost again. Coming out of the toilet was heartbreaking. I lost €2300 in 20 minutes. I couldn’t believe what happened. I lost my monthly salary and my credit card was getting empty again. 

    No one knew about my gambling addiction. No one knew I was taking loans. My fiancé and I never joined bank accounts, so there was no way for her to find out. Deep inside I knew I had a problem, but I didn’t want to admit it to myself. I was so sure big winnings were around the corner, that I could beat the system and that the next time luck will be on my side.

    In the next post, you can read how my addiction grew together with my dept.  

    *Resoruces: “Nikola Tesla, My Inventions: The Autobiography of Nikola Tesla”
    https://www.cambridge.org/core/journals/advances-in-psychiatric-treatment/article/from-the-gambler-within-dostoyevskys-the-gambler/D7ACB14B9EAD00EB8EF65512C28EADAA/core-reader

  • Neck Deep in Debt

    Neck Deep in Debt

    According to National Council on Problem Gambling the average gambler may have personal debts up to $90,000. I owe to banks €50 000, but their high interest rates and charges are likely to make the situation worse.

    Taking loans online is extremely easy, at least in Finland. If you provided the bank with a pay slip, it takes ca.10 minutes to get one. I was still working as a head chef full time, so at least I had my pay slips. In two years of active gambling, I took seven bank loans. The interest rates were high, but that was the only quick solution I could think of to pay my credit card and bills. Instead of stopping once the bills were paid, I would spend remaining money on gambling. It was a vicious circle and I got hooked. I could’t and didn’t know how to stop.

    The tension I felt every day was horrible. I was constantly thinking and calculating which loan to repay first. Since I was panicking so much and wanted to get my money back, I started making bets in every possible sport I could think of, even some tennis and rugby games I never watched before. I was making bets for all the leagues from Australia, Japan, Brazil… You name it, I was betting all of them. I even placed a bet for Eurovision song contest. 

    Worst of all, I completely lost the value for money. A bit over a year into betting, it took me one week to spend the loan of €4000, but later I was spending €3000 a day. I was constantly jumping from one betting site to another, checking who will give me better odds. On the rare occasions, when I didn’t have anything to bet on, I felt empty and bored.

    The greater the embarrassment and guilt because of betting were, the stronger defense mechanisms I developed. What an amazing liar I became. In a split second I could come up with a lie. My fiancé started noticing my mood changes and depression. She asked me countless times why I am getting angry so easily and why I am checking my phone constantly. I gave her lousy excuses that she didn’t believe in. She actually taught it was my way of escaping the disappointment we both felt because we couldn’t get pregnant for a few years. 

    The last summer, my fiancé went to visit her family without me, for two weeks. I thought I would feel free, because she wasn’t at home and I would have more time to gamble. Instead, I felt trapped and became so depressed, that I couldn’t get out of bed. I had no idea how to return the debt. Those two weeks were the loneliest in my life.

    At some point I remember calling her admitting I couldn’t get out of bed, without disclosing the real reason. I never had a courage to tell her the truth, because of the great fear of being judged and dumped. I was sure I’m strong enough to get through this by myself. 

    She was so worried that she convinced me to see a psychologist. I agreed, because the doctor was provided for free through the health insurance from my work. The doctor was an older man that asked me if I was still betting. I told him I stopped. The same evening I lost €700. I never visited him again, but the positive outcome of that meeting was the explanation I got about Finnish financial support systems that I will talk more about in one of the next posts.

    Not just that I became a liar, but I started hiding everything around our house that could make my fiancé suspicious. For example, I was rushing home every day, so that she wouldn’t see our mail and all the bills I was getting from seven different banks. 

    Finally, I spent all the loans, while bills were piling up. I couldn’t pay my share of the rent and I had no idea what to do. I tried to take more loans countless times, but all the banks rejected me, since I didn’t repay previous loans. I started asking at work if I could get my salary in advance, thinking that I can double it with the next bet. If I had some real estate, I would have sold it.

    The first time I couldn’t pay the rent, my fiancé realized something went terribly wrong. She started asking me questions and wanted to see my bank statement. I managed to come up with lies that calmed her down. I even showed her fake bank account statement. She believed me and it made me feel so much worse, because she didn’t deserve any of this. I didn’t want to lose her by telling her the truth, and I was worried our days together are numbered. That month, she payed our common bills.

    Even at times when I didn’t have money to pay the bills, I couldn’t stop thinking about gambling. When I would get a salary, I would spend it online, hoping that the next win is around the corner. I was still sure I can beat the system and win all my money back.

    The next month was the same – I couldn’t pay my share of the rent. However, this time my fiancé  was absolutely sure I was hiding something, so she started pressuring me to reveal the truth. Finally, she pushed me so much and I told her everything.

    Solutions Available for Gambling Debts


    In the next post you can read about how my fiancé reacted and how nothing was as I anticipated.

    3  ways to getout of gambling debt.


    Disclaimer:
    I’m writing this from my own experience. I’m not a doctor or financial advisor. All the advices I will write are the ones I wish I got before it was too late. 


    Don’t use credit cards!

    I truly hope that many countries will follow UK’s example. As of 14th of April 2020, they put a ban on credit card usage for online gambling.

    Tell someone about your problem!

    What we have is a serious illness that is impacting not only our lives in ever possible way, but also lives of our loved ones. The sooner you tell them, the sooner everyone will be able to move forward and make the best decisions for themselves.

    Seek financial assistance!

    I contacted free debt counseling service providers to discuss my situation. With their help, I learned about the best solutions to move forward.

    Don’t be hard on yourself! It’s not about what we lost, it’s all about the next right move. We can do this and we can all beat this addiction that is ruining our lives!

    Advice for families and friends

    If you are suspicious and think your loved one has financial problems, he or she most likely has. If you notice change in the behavior, don’t assume what the reasons are, but ask questions instead. Ask until you know the truth. 

    If you find out that your loved one is a compulsive gambler, it will probably completely change the perception of your past, present and future. All the plans you had might vanish. You will loose trust. However, please always remember one thing:

    He or she is a gambler, but s/he is still the same person you love dearly, with all the same fears, hopes and qualities. You got to know another side that you didn’t know existed and that side will need your help. S/he is equally lost and scared as you are.

    Gambling addiction is a curable disease that only with a help of professionals can be overcome. It is not your responsibility to cure them, but the most important thing you can do is to guide your dear person and help her or him to see the advantages of the therapy and psychologists.

    Take just one step at a time and don’t forget to take very good care of yourself.